Answering Client Questions about Mediumship Readings.
After a loved one has made their transition to the spirit world you miss them, especially their physical presence and how easily you communicated. Often you want to know if they’re aware of how lonely you are without them, or the challenges you’re now facing, or if they know there was a new addition to the family, or know of your recent accomplishments. You may want advice on what to do about a certain situation, or changing an aspect of your life. The list of questions is endless. Many times the answers you yearn for come through in the mediumship reading, but sometimes they don’t.
The question that often follows from clients is, “Why didn’t they say anything about this during the mediumship reading?”
There are a number of answers to this question. First, they’re aware of what’s going on in your life, maybe not minute by minute, but they’re absolutely aware of the highlights. Many times they’re so excited to be communicating with you and sharing all the wonderful memories of their lives that they momentarily forget to congratulate you on your promotion, or say anything about the arrival of the new baby. It’s not that they don’t know, it’s just that they have so much they want to share with you, that perhaps before they got around to it the hour flew by.
Another reason may be that you are intent on getting a specific answer from them about something. For example, you want to know where the life insurance policy is. They may or may not recall this, just like you may put things away and then not remember where you put them; they’re no different. So they may focus on showing you places where they think they may have put the insurance policy. They’re trying hard to remember, but consequently they’re so engrossed in trying to help you they forget to send that birthday cake image to say, “Happy Birthday” to you.
You have to realize that making a transition from this world to the next does not automatically make your loved one a saint, or a seer. They retain their character traits and personality when they go to the other side. And, they may not remember everything. Have you ever talked about a memory of a family event with a sibling and learned that their memory is completely different than yours? Or, that you recall things about the event that they don’t, and they recall things that you don’t remember either. This doesn’t change when you go to the spirit world.
Another reason you may not get an answer can depend on the relationship you had with your deceased loved one when they were alive. If you weren’t in the habit of asking their advice, or discounted their advice when they gave it they may hold back from advising you now. Perhaps they know you never listen to advice! A word of caution, if they gave terrible advice when they were alive don’t expect them to be a sage now.
If they were the type of person who didn’t share much about their lives, or shared only what they wanted you to know and held back the rest, they’ll be the same in the mediumship reading. If they were shy, quiet, talked very little, slow to form relationships and, or distrustful of strangers they may not communicate any differently from the other side. If they loved being the center of attention and told stories to answer questions, they’ll do the same thing through a medium. Always keep in mind when posing a question who they were in life.
In addition, you may be asking questions and looking for direction that you’re not truly ready to act upon. For example, you want to know if you should leave your job, sell your home, or get a divorce. It may be that you already know the answer deep down, but you’re not emotionally ready to leave any of these scenarios behind. And, even if you don’t know at a gut level if you’re not emotionally ready to make these changes telling you to do so prematurely will be of little help. You probably won’t act on the advice because there’s too much emotional resistance inside that you still need to come to terms with first.
Conversely, if you ask a question such as, “How much more time does Mom have?” Or, “How am I going to get out of this mess?” They may not answer if it’s not in your best interest. They may know there’s little time left for your mother before she makes her transition, and not want you to panic, or interfere in the natural course of events by telling you. They may also know that your life mission is to figure out how to solve the problems you created for your own greater spiritual growth, and therefore not provide the answer.
The advice I give clients prior to mediumship readings is to let your loved ones know about the upcoming mediumship reading appointment. Ask them to be there and ask them to answer your question. Talk to them as if they were right next to you (most likely they are). Keep reminding them daily about the reading and the question you want them to answer. Do not make a laundry list of questions. Let them be themselves in the reading, and let it be an expression of their love for you. Allow them to share what they want with you. I guarantee they will bring up memories you had long forgotten about, and it will be much more meaningful because they remembered this special thing about you.
Have a question about Mediumship Readings? Leave it in the comments below.
After getting the call that my father passed away, I picked up my mother and raced to the hospital.
The nurse handed us a brown paper bag with his personal effects and then led us to the room where he spent his last moments alive. I looked at him but, while it was his body – it was no longer him. I “knew” he was no longer in there.
I pulled two chairs along side of the hospital bed and we sat down, neither one of us saying a word.
After a while my eyes began playing tricks on me. Had he just blinked?
No. It was just wishful thinking.
“Dad, talk to me, please,” I thought while staring intently at his lifeless body. “Are you alright? Was someone here from the spirit world to meet you when you vacated your body?”
I had so many thoughts racing through my mind. Would he come through to me?
I didn’t want to upset my mother. She cried softly into a tissue held over the bottom half of her face. I forced back my own tears so, I wouldn’t make it any worse for her.
My mother got up to use the restroom, leaning heavily on her cane as she walked into the hospital corridor.
Suddenly, on the other side of the bed stood my father and his sister with their arms around one another – beaming! A wavy light framed them. This light had “depth” to it, almost as if it were a portal where I could “walk” into their world and join them if I wanted to. And, oh how I wanted to but, I couldn’t move. I was frozen in place, transfixed by what I was seeing.
Neither of them said anything but, they didn’t have to. I could tell from the expression on their faces that they were laughing and enjoying their reunion. I felt my heart open up and wave of love from the two of them poured into it. The love they sent was beyond words to describe. It hit me with a mighty force – thwack!
My father was wearing his favorite safari jacket and beloved Greek fisherman’s cap. My aunt glowed in a peacock blue gown and matching scarf in her hair. And then, in flash they disappeared.
“No! Wait,” I cried.
I bounded to the other side of the bed where they had stood only seconds before, “Come back. Talk to me, please.”
But, it was over and they had gone.
“What if it was my imagination,” I thought beginning to doubt myself. Had I really seen them or had my desire to “see” my father created this vision?
I pulled a tissue from my purse to wipe my eyes and sat down.
I kept looking around the room hoping that my father and aunt would reappear but, they never did.
That evening I called a fellow medium.
I told her that I’d seen my father but, gave her no details other than telling her he hadn’t said anything to me.
“Can you bring my father through?” I asked rather impatiently. “I have to know he is alright.”
And then she said, “He’s here and he is with a woman wearing a long blue dress with a matching blue band in her hair.”
My knees actually buckled. I was so happy. She was seeing exactly what I had seen.
Andreaaccurately described my father, whom she had never met, and what I had seen him wearing. He told her how he had passed and that he was now okay. He described his “journey to the other side” as being “out of this world” which was also extremely evidential. One of his favorite phrases had been to say, “It was out of this world.”
He also showed her several other relatives he was celebrating being reunited with and gave their names – all of whom I recognized. Everything she saw and heard was evidential and proved to me that she really was communicating with my father. Of course, the major proof for me was that she saw both he and my aunt in the exact same way I had.
I was so relieved to hear that he was alright. I felt my father’s presence and the love he had for me while the medium was communicating with him. I felt great joy that he was celebrating with his parents, and other relatives. I still grieved over the loss of his physical presence but, I didn’t feel he was lost to me forever. I felt he was with me right by side and it was so very comforting.
In the days and months after my father passed I saw him numerous times and also got many signs of his presence. And, I never doubted again thanks to the validation I received that day.
Four main reasons people see a medium
1. Evidence of survival of death. Even if you are in the habit of seeing or hearing spirits and sensing their presence, like I was, you might think that what is happening to you is just your imagination. It’s natural to doubt and think you made it all up when you want something so badly. Having a medium bring through your loved one will validate what has been happening to you. No, you’re not going crazy. It really was him or her.
The medium conveyed what she saw, and there she was, my lovely Mom, recalling all the happy events of her life in detail, reassuring me that her spiritual body was whole, that she would always look out for us, describing my recent accident and a number of other memories. Now, the medium had no way of knowing any of these things and I was amazed at the connection I felt. At the end of the hour-long reading, I closed my eyes and felt my Mom hug me from behind and place her cheek close to mine, as she always did. I have not felt happier in my life.
Though I felt sad today, her third anniversary because she is no longer with us, in some sense, I also felt immeasurable peace, because of this reading. Love never dies. –Vidya Sury, Vidya Sury.com*
2. Feel their love again. Feeling the love they send you makes you realize that they do live on and that love never dies. After all, the only thing you take with you on the journey when you transition are your memories and the loving bonds you created. Many times we know that they are present because we “feel” their presence and feel the love we shared with them but, we want “proof” that it is real. When you feel their love while in the company of a medium it increases your belief and faith in life after death.
My mediumship reading brought me a lot of peace. My father passed from Alzheimer’s. Although my beliefs led me to believe that he hadn’t died but only passed to a new dimension, it still bothered me. I wanted to know if he was still in a fog, as he was before he passed, or was he free from his prison and free once again. During the reading my father came through at once, as if he were there waiting to come in. He “put” pictures into the medium’s mind that she conveyed to me. I immediately felt connected to my Dad and could feel his energy of love. Everything that she “saw” I could relate too and understood why he was sharing it with us. At the end of the conversation I was completely convinced that my father is out of his prison, that he is happy and free and at peace. Not only that, he is still with me whenever I “call” and walking with me illuminating my way when I need him. Today I felt so light and peaceful myself knowing that he truly is still a part of my life and that I will see him again when I pass. –Vicki Pearson*
3. Heal grief. Your pain at losing them is healed by knowing that you are only temporarily separated and that you will see your loved one again. While you will still grieve and miss them terribly you will also feel joy at knowing that they are still with you and that you can speak to them and that they do, in fact, hear you. Your grief will lesson when you realize that they can be with you at all major family events and that you can hear through a medium about the details of the event and “know” they really were there.
Since my mediumship reading, although I dearly miss my brother, I feel so close to him, know he is with me, have evidential messages that have stayed with me and it’s made a difference that I hadn’t expected to feel. I turned a corner in terms of the pain- and for anyone who is grieving the loss of somebody they loved, I wish this for you as well. –Lisa Claudia Briggs, Intuitive Body*
4. Validate your experiences.All the little signs they send or dreams they visit you in will become much more meaningful as you will know with complete certainty, that this is really coming from them. You will have an entirely new perspective on “physical death.” And, an entirely new outlook on life.
After my reading, I now know without a doubt that we never lose connection with those we love after they transition. A year after my mom died I was at my grandson’s birthday party. Before walking into my daughter’s home the hair on my arms stood up and I knew she was with us. I didn’t think of it again until after the party was over. My daughter asked everyone if they wanted a glass of wine. She took the bottle out of the fridge and the name on the label was “Seven Daughters.” My mom had seven daughters. It was then that I remembered feeling her presence earlier. –Tess Marshall, The Bold Life*
“I love crime, I love mysteries, and I love ghosts.” –Steven King
Today I have the pleasure of welcoming Loyd Auerbach to Powered by Intuition.
Loyd is a parapsychologist and Director of the Office of Paranormal Investigations in San Francisco, CA. He is also the incoming President of the Forever Family Foundation and one of the foremost experts on the subjects of the paranormal and hauntings in the US today. He is also an author on numerous books on these topics.
What follows is a transcript of our recorded conversation which you can listen to here.
Angela: Loyd, tell us about this explosion of ghost hunting television shows. What’s your opinion of these shows that seem to be all over cable television? Are they staged? Is there any real value to these shows in your opinion?
Loyd: By having these shows on, more and more of the general public are coming out of woodwork and talking about their experiences.
What you see on TV is the product of the producer. It is not the product of the investigator, it also not the product of the psychic on the shows; it is the product of the producers.
Consequently, when we talk about staging, a lot can be done in editing. Let’s say you got a higher reading going near on wall with an EMF reader because of bad wiring, what they cut in instead when they show it is a voice over from a different part of the shoot that says, “Hey somebody is seeing something right now.”
So, a lot of what you may see you cannot take as this is what actually was going on, in some producer’s perspective, it’s not really staging because the things actually happened; they just didn’t happen in that order.
So, if shows can only be taken for their entertainment value, they should not be taken for any resemblance of reality, in fact no reality show should be taken as being reality.
Angela: Everywhere you look, you see ghost hunting groups. What kind of training do they have?
Loyd: None, they watch TV Shows.
Loyd: Seriously, a couple of years ago there was a group that got into New York Post or the New York Daily News because they did a case in the Bronx. It was their second case, big deal. In the article they reported that they said, “We watched a bunch of TV shows.” That was their entire training.
Where this has really gone wrong is that on television shows parapsychologists used various pieces of technology in our investigations earlier than the 80s. We were using this technology to determine if there were changes in the environment when people have experiences, not to detect ghosts, that’s not what they’re for.
Because these things are handheld and not that expensive and because of the TV shows, they made them seem like they were “ghost detection devices” and suddenly anyone can go out and buy one of these things and call it a ghost detector and so it’s a hobby that grew into some of the people calling themselves professionals, which is absolutely absurd.
Angela: The one thing that really bothers me is that all the television show are shot in the dark. What’s the reason for that?
Loyd: There’s absolutely no reason for that and there’s no precedent for that in the field.
The number of times the producers want to shoot it at night even though the events were happening during the day was outlandish. The number of times producers moaned or directors moaned about the fact that it was not spooky enough if the lights were on. Suddenly, night shot cameras come in and all of the sudden, the producers are shooting in the dark. If you think there’s a connection, there is. Before that trend, making scenes that ghosts appear only at night was insane because experiences do happen all the time in fact they happen less at night when people are asleep than they happen when people are awake or the lights on.
Angela: Do you think any of these shows ever actually capture a real haunting?
Loyd: Production people seek out locations that have some kind of reputation for activity. Sometimes they will vet those places, in fact, interestingly enough one of the craziest shows on TV I think Ghost Adventures, really does. That’s the one where this guy locks himself in the location and to me their show is, in some respects, the least offensive in that it never pretends like they’re experts, although lately they’ve been talking that way, which is too bad.
The people on the show, when they talk with it, that’s often edited in such a way that if a producer wants it to appear like an evil location, they will edit out the parts where say the ghost never bothered me, or the ghost never does this; basically making it look like its bad.
Angela: Yes, it makes no sense.
Loyd: Yes, you have to do research on the location and you have to find out if there are current witnesses.
Angela: What are some of the types of equipment that we see them using on these shows?
Loyd: They are using different kinds of electro-magnetic field detectors. We actually have found some interesting correlation between unexplained magnetic fields. There are different forms of those meters, some of them actually work well and some of them actually do not work well, in fact some of them and one of the particular, is a meter that you see so often on these shows is the one that lights up. The actual microphones that these guys are wearing will affect that, cell phone signals will affect that, and a number of things can affect that so in some respects the production personnel wanted to make the thing light up and even though is of no help to the ghost hunters. So, there are issues around that. You also have different types that are actually thermometers that measure air temperature and some are surface temperature thermometers which are often misused unfortunately. There are thermal vision cameras which is something that a couple of us, me and Andy Nicolas first used back in the early 90s in hopes of visually seeing cold spots.
Angela: I see.
Loyd: You have things like digital recorders. People love to get their EVPs – Electronic Voice Phenomena.
Angela: I always wondered about EVP. I know that there is a real big interest in it and there are some people who have gotten something. Tell us about that.
Loyd: Typically if you’re getting voices from the dead, they are using what we call psycho-kinesis, mind over matter, so you affect the device, the recording device or the tape or whatever else is going on. It’s not a voice, in fact the very definition of electronic voice phenomena, the electronic voice piece that means, the voice was created inside the device, it was not the voice that can be heard, you heard it and recorded it, that would be voice phenomena, non-electric.
Angela: I see.
Loyd: It also means that living people can affect those devices. There is always one person, in every ghost hunting group it seems who always gets EVP. The rest of them barely ever get anything. If that one person is always getting under the same conditions and no one else is, there’s something special about that one person and that one person may in fact be a medium without realizing it, they may actually be interacting or acting as the intermediary between the spirit, if there is a spirit there and the device or if the person’s own expectation is causing the voices to happen.
Angela: Can you tell us the difference, you were talking about the residual energy and hauntings and apparitions, I think people find it very confusing, it’s kind of overlapping or fine line, can you just describe that for us?
Loyd: Well, first of all, apparitions are ghosts. The idea that consciousness doesn’t end at the death of the body, so you are dealing with a person who stuck around after the death, that’s an apparition, the traditional ghostly spirit, they’re not tied to a location it seems, even though some of them are seen at certain locations, they are not tied to those locations, where as a haunting, where really a haunt is a place, in fact the word haunt does not occur only to the dead. We haunt places, living people haunt places, the probably that’s the example of the Norman on the television show Cheers.
Angela: I was just going to say like the local watering hole.
Loyd: Exactly, the regulars are haunting the place itself and probably will after they die too. So the idea of when we use the word haunting, we are referring to locations, we are referring to places that hold information about those people or animals or events that happened in those places, even recent ones and those events are recorded by the living and not the dead. So it’s not the ghost who leaves an impression, it is a living person who leave an impression.
A good example with and there are many of these around the world and they reported over the years. People are going to the house that had a murder and whether they knew about it or not, they will see the murder re-enacted and some of those instances they come to find out that the murderer is still alive and what they see in terms of the image or the picture they are getting in their mind on that murder stops when the victim dies or the murderer walks out of the room and that’s because the corpse leaves no impression, living people leave impressions. Consequently you have hauntings where there are foot sounds in the kitchen, footsteps walking back and forth because somebody dead is pacing back and forth there. One of my real cases with the haunts were the impression was to people making love pretty loudly apparently.
Angela: Oh, wow!
Loyd: They were still alive, in fact they’ve been the only owners of the house, they’re still alive and occasionally even get a haunting with sorts of when people see a figure and they come to recognize that the figure is themselves.
Angela: Wow, how does that happen?
Loyd: Well, I mean how people get recorded on video, environment acts like a video camera in that sense.
Angela: Going back to the couple who was heard making love, they sold their home, they moved elsewhere and the people who bought their home just encountered this and over and over?
Loyd: Every night as it happens around 3 o’clock in the morning and I actually talk about, was finally able to get the information from the previous owner and talk to the guy and when I got them on the phone and told them their housewas haunted, this was a new house, relatively 5-years old. That’s ridiculous, the house is not haunted, and I said well, what is 3 o’clock in the morning I mean to you and your wife? And there is dead silence on the other end of the phone and he said what are you talking about, you got to tell me what’s going on and I told them and it said okay, I’m not going to say why because it’s a long story but yes my wife and I wake up almost every morning at 3 o’clock and we made love and we probably were pretty loud in times.
Angela: And so that’s how it happened?
Loyd: They were in their late 20s by the way.
Angela: You need a lot of energy to wake up every night at three o’clock in the morning but, so this was imprinted in the walls of their home?
Loyd: This is where we bring in the idea of magnetic fields, it maybe imprinted in the local field of the house or the land. It’s a little bit of fun, this is actually one of the more interesting pieces of field research.
Angela: Wow, I’ve never heard of that honestly that’s really fascinating and of course this is a subject of great interest that I read a lot about and I have no idea that a place could be haunted people who are still living.
Loyd: I mean, think about it, if you’ve ever done house haunting and you are walking to a house as your house haunting and you got a really bad vibe, that’s what you are picking up, you are picking the owners and you are picking up their emotions.
Angela: I was wondering if you could give some of our viewers a few tips on how to identify if they had a real something going on in their home, you know people will say oh I heard the cabinets opening in my kitchen, what should they look for, what would give you the biggest clues that there is something real here aside from hearing somebody making love that wasn’t in the house?
Loyd: Usually that’s something pretty dramatic if there is a person that shows up and then disappears, those kinds of things that are really evocative, and tend to be more convincing that the place is just haunted. I tell people if they want to know if their house is haunted, the first thing I’d say is think that it’s not and start looking for other explanations, that’s what we do, we go in and first try to find explanations.
So, we see on those shows that they are misusing the word debunking, they said they are going to go in and debunk what people are reporting, that’s not what it is, the word debunking refers to people who are faking you out and being fraudulent. Most people are not attempting that. They misunderstand ordinary occurrences and misplace them and mislabel them very often as paranormal ones especially thanks to TV Shows. A lot of times it’s just simply that the people are not knowledgeable about the construction of their home or the weather or other things, so without being knowledgeable, you may not be aware that certain things are pretty normal but, will happen in random occasions. Depending on where you live, if you live in a place where temperature changes dramatically from day to night, the house makes a lot of noise.
Angela: Yes, that’s true.
Loyd: If you are in a place that has pretty steady temperature, there is no house settling noises. So if you move from a place where there’s no house settling noises from a place where there is and you never experienced that, you might think your house is haunted. If you are in a place that has animals like raccoons suddenly camping around or in my case, we have wild turkeys in the area and summer time they get on the roof in the morning and you might think someone is walking on your roof or attic.
So you try to explain it away first but if you have somebody prop up in front of you and say to you hi and then they disappear, it’s a pretty good kind.
Angela: One confusing term is apparition because maybe you think you are going to see the real person from the head to toe as if they were a physical person but, could it also just be like an energy mass like a swirling egg shape?
Loyd: It can be, it’s typically not and typically people when they see apparitions, it’s really not that they sees the apparitions. They are not seeing with their eyes, they are seeing them in their minds, so maybe the apparition of the person who is the apparition broadcasting a signal and broadcasting a clear picture but, your brain or your mind is not picking up a clear picture, so you see a fuzzy blob of energy or you see dark shadow.
One of the things that I’m really annoyed by on these shows and the folklore is that when you see that dark shadow, suddenly that’s something evil. It just may mean that the person can’t come into the light, they can’t be seen properly and I’ve also seen this shows were they walk in and they get an EVP and the EVP and somebody yelling get out, If you are here show yourself or we will do this, this and this” So suddenly they get this message from the spirit that says, Get out,” and they immediately declared that the spirit is an evil spirit.
Angel: Yes, anti-social.
Loyd: Right, which actually the spirit is to me is acting in true kind actually less rude than they were. They’re the evil ones for going in and trying to provoke someone.
Angela: What should a person do when they think they’re being bothered? On these shows people are always being “pushed.”
Loyd: Yes. I think a lot of it is b.s.
Angela: What should someone do if they wake up and there is a person there and they are not threatening? Would you just live with them and say, “Well that’s cool my house is haunted?”
Loyd: You try to communicate, you say hi, I mean the real thing to do is say, hello, my name is Lloyd or whatever your name is, what can I do for you, who are you, what do you need, what do you need from me, what can I do for you and what’s really been interesting is when people have the presence of mind to do that, in some cases we actually get reports back like the ghost suddenly looked at them like in surprise and disappeared and never showed up again.
Angela: As if, maybe they didn’t think that they were being seen?
Loyd: Right, right and then another case is they got people to get a communication but there is this fear element that’s been generated to so often, but it’s really not for the shows but it’s kind of engraved in the culture that ghosts are bad and really the funny thing is if you look at the movies, if you really look at the history of motion pictures and even TV shows are already of ghost portrayal, what I’m talking about is ghost of people who used to be alive, not demons or other things almost all of the ghost movies, almost all the TV shows are comedies or dramas, rarely ever do anything bad to people. They are actually there to communicate because they don’t want to leave their home, these are often very normal things going on, sometimes they want to party and sometime they have unfinished business that you can help them with and some sort of thing that is very normal in human beings. Most people are not nasty, some people are, I mean some people just by nature are really rude and most people are not. The vast majority of human race is not evil. I’m thinking perhaps, rude perhaps, uncaring but not evil.
Angela: So ghosts are the same, they don’t change once they die, that’s their personality?
Loyd: Not while they still sit here with us.
Angela: Right, they evolve with time. But, I have felt, in my own experience as a medium it’s not scary at all. It’s pretty normal in fact but, these TV shows make it out to be as if every spirit is evil, and they are up to get you and they are going to push you down the stairs, which I think rarely happens.
Loyd: Yes, actually I had a case where the family were seeing, the day before I got there, the family saw the apparition at the top of its corridor and one of the family member, the father got so freaked out, he turned around and ran right into a wall and knocked himself silly. The first thing that came out of his mouth when he came to a moment later was the ghost threw me into the wall. The rest of the family saw the ghost over on the stairs and they said something to the effect, “No you are just an idiot.
Angela: He was embarrassed and trying to cover his tracks, right?
Loyd: Yes.And in fact, when we got there, they were very afraid before that because they weren’t able to communicate with the ghost. But when that happened and when I got there, they were not afraid anymore because now they knew that the ghost didn’t do anything to them.
Angela: Right, yes, that’s pretty cool. So then you just try to communicate with them and then you don’t need to call an exorcist?
Loyd: No, if you really need to get rid of the ghost, I would say, annoy them out of your house?
Angela: How do you do that?
Loyd: You figure out what kind of music they might not like and you play it over and over again with the intention that they should leave and you tell them that they should leave at that point. You read kids riddles over and over and over again until everybody is sick of them. Certain music does seem to work very well, if you recall the movie Ghost, Patrick Swayze’s character got Whoopi Goldberg to pay attention to him by singing, “I am Henry the Eighth I am,” over and over and over again.
Angela: I forgot about that.
Loyd: That actually came from my first book because what I suggest is you pick a song and you play it over and over again to get rid of the ghost.
Angela: Right, and they used that to get her attention, the medium, I didn’t know that, how cool, wow. What if you fill the house with the odors of foods that the ghost doesn’t like, does that work?
Loyd: Yea, psychically, you got to pick up on those odors that would probably work too. Think about it this way, if you have this neighbor who just drops in unannounced and won’t leave unless you physically throw them out, how do you possibly get that person out of there without physically throwing them out? You think of those kind of things and try them out.
Angela: You’ve got the strategy for the guest that wouldn’t leave.
Loyd: Exactly, I got the idea from the old SNL skits about the guest that wouldn’t leave with John Belushi.
Angela: Right, you have to stop feeding them. What about your own personal belief now that you have been doing this for 30 years?
Loyd: Over 30 years.
Angela: Do you believe in the continuation of consciousness after physical death as far as beyond haunting?
Loyd: I do, I definitely believe in it, not everybody sticks around is a ghost, it seems although we have thousands of thousands of cases, its kind of a disproportionate numbers of reports about apparitions that are here to say goodbye to family members. So they do a very quick time, sign or they show up or they say goodbye in some way, then they’re gone. There are few of us a very, very tiny percentage of people who die who stick around for quite some time and it’s that really small percentage of apparitions but to me the evidence is clear that something survived. There’s “something” that can live without or outside the body without the body and without the brain.
The brain may have actually created that “something.” I don’t know that if it is something that came before people were born and then there’s evidence of reincarnation reports as well but, it maybe that the brain generates consciousness, generates this reality and after the brain dies, that thing could stick around, can be coherent. I don’t know, we have the conference to Forever Family Foundation about the after-life and I do believe that mediums are communicating with somebody. Where we go after we die is something very different.
Loyd: Very different platform that when they communicate back to us, they can only communicate in certain words that we can understand, so describing, I know that when couple of the astronauts were far away from earth and looking back on earth, the had an experience or had a feeling that is very difficult to put into words.
Angela: Yes, it was indescribable.
Loyd: Like saying, what love is? How do you describe love, you can describe actions around there, like how do you describe what that feels like, so it maybe that they have been stuck with terms that we can recognize and constantly we get the picture of the afterlife based on a filter, and the filter is probably the medium himself, he could be alive.
Angela: Yes, limited consciousness that you have, yes because I mean I’ve read so many things about the after-life not being a place but a frequency and I have trouble understanding.
Loyd: I got a problem with that word.
Angela: Yes, I mean, how do you exist within frequency? I guess it’s like you’re just like a radio wave that just keeps going on and on and on.
Loyd: You know, you maybe some form of energy and energetically connected with other things but is there a physical existence the way we think of it which is what we hear about? I tend to think that it’s not same kind of physical world. We can’t describe it.
Angela: Where can viewers contact you if they want more info?
Loyd: I have 2 websites, one is mindreader.com which is the best one to go and get this, that’s my parapsychology stuff and my other site of my life, my chocolate life you go to hauntedbychocolate.com.
Angela: Yes, you are also a chocolatier. You actually make chocolate.
Loyd: Yes, I make my own chocolate and right now I’m selling that chocolate for the holidays. And for the paranormally inclined, we are offering “Ghost drops.”
Angela: Are they chocolates shaped little ghosts?
Loyd: No, they have little ghosts on them.
Angela: Great. I love it.
Loyd: Also, I’ll just mention that I teach distant learning courses at HCH University in Parapsychology. I also teach an online course in Parapsychology for Atlantic University and I’ll be teaching an investigation class with the Rhine Research Center which is rhinecenter.org. starting in late January that will be an online class as well.
Angela: Oh good, so people interested in getting trained to be ghost hunters should take this course, right?
Angela: Thank you Lloyd, it has been a pleasure, I really appreciate you’re shedding some light on this topic because it has been one of some confusion. It’s been a pleasure speaking with you and thank you so much.
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Loyd Auerbach, M.S.holds a BA in Cultural Anthropology (though he started out in Astrophysics!) from Northwestern University (1978), and an MS in Parapsychology from John F. Kennedy University (1981). Lloyd is the author of numerous books on the paranormal. You can find them all here. He is the director of “The Office of Paranormal Investigations,” a professor at Atlantic University, an instructor at HCH Institute, Parapsychological studies and an adjuct at JFK University, on the board at the Rhine Research Center, incoming president for 2013 for The Forever Family Foundation, on the advisory board of the Wind Bridge Institute and a member of the Psychic Entertainers Association.
While internal seeing was not unusual for me – this was different.
The elderly woman I was “seeing” in my mind’s eye started to move around and speak to me. That had never happened before in a reading.
She showed me a big pot of pasta sauce cooking on her stove and then started speaking with a heavy Italian accent while pointing her wooden spoon to punctuate her words.
When I described this scene to my client she responded right away by saying that it was her grandmother. And then she said, “But, she’s dead.”
I really didn’t know what to say to my client at that point.
It never occurred to me that I might have actually “seen” a spirit. I also had no idea what a medium was back then either.
I assumed I was picking up a memory from my client and left it at that.
Things of this nature kept happening sporadically throughout the years. I never gave it a second though, until five years ago when the incidents began to happen frequently. It was at this point that I decided to see what might be happening to me and I began to learn about mediumship.
We know for sure it’s not a memory when the spirit passes along evidence that the client has no knowledge of but, is later verified by someone in the client’s family.
I gave a reading to to my friend Eric Watermolen, and during the reading several of his wife’s deceased relatives showed up. He was aware of some of the details but, most of it had to be verified by his wife and mother-in-law later.
Mediums pass along information to clients that cannot be verified until they return home and question other family members all the time. I would call that “real.”
I would also go so far as to say that if a medium is given one piece of information that cannot be found in the client’s memory and is only verifiable by another family member not present at the session than, all the information that a medium gets is from the spirit.
When a spirit starts communicating the medium gets flooded by impressions. The spirit works very hard to try to “impress” the communication upon the medium telepathically. If a medium were only reading someone’s memories they wouldn’t “flood” the medium’s mind.
The client who goes to see a medium is not sitting there “sending” out their memories. The client is in a receptive state waiting for the medium to bring back the details from the spirit.
Yes, spirit communication is real.
Are there frauds out there? Yes, of course.
How to know if you are working with a “real” medium.
The medium should not ask you for name, age, birth sign or address of the person.
They should be able to describe the person’s physical appearance and/or personality to a degree that you “know” who it is. Some mediums do not “see” but, “hear” so you may not be given a blow by blow description of the person. The point is that you are given enough information to “know” from the details who the medium is connecting to.
The medium should be able to give you some specific some details. For example they might tell you what the person died from or what their hobbies were or where they worked or how many children they had.
They should also be able to pass along a shared memory or two that the client would recall. If the spirit has a personal message for the client the medium should be able to pass that along as well.
The proof is in the “Spirit art”
One of my dear friends, Randi Silber, brought my father through last year during a reading exchange. She’s a gifted medium and talented spirit artist. Here’s the likeness she drew of my dad while communicating with him. Below is a photo of me and my father from before he got ill.
Spirit drawing by Randi Silber
How could a spirit artist get so much detail from a memory?
They couldn’t. I have trouble bringing up my father’s likeness in my mind sometime. I have to look at a photo to really recall the details of his face. My friend Randi had never seen my father before. How could she have drawn such a remarkable likeness?
The fact is that the person who is now in spirit has to be communicating and sending this information to the mind of the medium for them to “see” the person so clearly and draw them.
Check out this amazing video of Spirit Artist Coral Polge:
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