There’s a big difference between intuition & wishful thinking. And the differences are maximized to the 10th power when your heart is broken.
Wishful thinking is trying to manifest a particular outcome in which you have very little influence.
You know it’s wishful thinking if you vacillate between faith that it’s going to happen and fear that it won’t. The fear stems from your attachment to the outcome and from not wanting to hear your intuition, which may be telling you otherwise.
When you’re attached to seeing only one outcome you will block your intuition from coming through. No matter how many times you ask for intuitive guidance you’ll find yourself unsure of whether your intuition was saying yes you’ll get back together or if it was just your wishful thinking. (Watch the video at the end about why wishful thinking blocks your intuition).
Don’t confuse wishful thinking for faith
Having faith is when you are confident that things are going to work out for the best and for your highest good, for all parties concerned—no matter what.
You know it’s true faith if you’re able to relinquish the need to control the outcome, meaning you practice non-attachment to how your desire will manifest or even if it will manifest at all. You have faith that a power greater than you knows what it is doing.
Understanding where the confusion comes from
What I’m referring to is what can be most confusing about knowing that we create our reality. So many people think that if they just maintain a positive outlook and visualize and keep seeing that something has worked out the way they desire it, that it will eventually.
The dark side of the Law of Attraction
The good thing about more people knowing about the LOA is that it expanded our collective consciousness to realizing that we can and do create our reality with our thoughts and emotions. The dark side is that many people may be “holding thoughts” believing that this is what you’re supposed to do to make LOA work.
When you “hold thoughts” you focus intently upon one specific outcome without allowing the Universe to provide an even better outcome or what might be in your highest good.
Say your greatest desire is to be reunited with your ex.
Or playing the lottery and hitting it big.
Is there a chance your ex could see the “error of their ways” and return to you? Yes, of course.
Is there a chance you could pick the winning lottery numbers? Yes, of course.
The two key questions though are – is it in your best interest to focus all your attention on trying to force this outcome and can you exert any influence upon the situations you desire to manifest? In other words what recourse do you have, what actions can you take to co-create the future you desire?
Put your efforts into things where you can have an impact
Obsessively trying to win the lottery or on getting someone else to do something is futile. The lottery is a game of chance. Nothing you do can change the odds. Even if you were to sell your house and use the money to buy 350,000 lottery tickets and try 350,000 number combinations there is no guarantee you would win (and people have done that and lost).
Holding thoughts about the return of someone who has broken up with you and moved on is also futile. If the person won’t speak to you, see you, answer your calls or letters and has made it clear that it is over then you are expending all your energy on something that is beyond your control to influence.
If you enter a sweepstakes where the winner is chosen based upon an essay or jingle or slogan you must create then you have an opportunity to take an action that could help you win.
If your ex is speaking to you, going to couples counseling or open to the idea of working things out and will see you then by all means exert every positive effort you can to get back together.
Plus, what other opportunities are you missing and perhaps walking right past that don’t see because you’re focused on holding thoughts about this one thing working out the way you want? The truth is opportunity exists all around us all the time it’s only our perception that limits us from seeing these doorways.
Understanding why we want certain things
If we examine our desire to “win the lottery” we will see that what we truly desire is financial security. If you truly believe you’re lucky there’s no need to obsess about winning, is there? You probably already “win” at things often.
When we are heart-sick over the loss of the love of our lives and continually focus on bringing them back what we really are pining after is “how we felt” when the person was in our lives. We felt “whole and complete.” We believe our happiness will return when this person returns when really what we’re missing is the “feeling” of happiness we had.
“Holding thoughts” holds up our future
When we wish for one outcome so intently we are telling the Universe that we believe we have all the answers. We are broadcasting that we don’t trust the stuff of the Universe to mix and meld properly unless we are in control.
To be overly attached to a single outcome impedes the creative spark of the Universe. Are you not impressed with the way the Universe “engineers” things and delights you with the surprising ways they manifest? Wishing for only this one outcome means that what you will get is likely to be devoid of the “creative spark.”
What is the Creative Spark?
It’s that magical spark that is created when the Universe orchestrates events in our lives. It is an act of creation that is above and beyond our small human control. It is when the Universe pours through us using us as a vessel to create.
It’s the synchronicity of bumping into a person by sheer coincidence at the dog groomer’s and falling madly in love. It’s sitting down at the computer and having an inspired piece of writing come through you. It’s an inspired idea for a business or new service that literally falls from the sky into your mind one day. This is the “creative spark.”
We can never recreate that – it just happens, courtesy of the Universe. It cannot be forced by sheer will. Your will is not creative and it will never be creative. True creativity is channeled through human beings from a higher power, what I refer to as Greater Intelligence. It never comes through using the rational mind or through the use of sheer will. Inspiration or true creativity is communicated to you from Greater Intelligence via your intuition.
Holding thoughts snuffs out the Creative Spark
If you “hold thoughts” about having the love of your life return you might “make it happen” but, like trying to bring back the dead you might end up in soulless zombie-like relationship. A zombie is “soulless” simply because when the witchdoctor brings them back to life they have no soul.
You cannot force your will upon another person, even if you think you’re only working the “laws of attraction” and not holding them by physical force. The act of focusing so intently upon one outcome, especially when it involves another human being, is an act of bondage. Why does a witchdoctor create a zombie in the first place? Because he wants a slave.
When you acquire anything through forcing your will you are creating bondage. Anything you acquire by this method will not be what you had hoped. It will be devoid of soul – devoid of the creative spark of life.
The only way to bring back the love of your life is to completely let them go. If they are meant to return to you they are going to return of their own free will. Only then will you have the happiness you desire.
When we’re attached to one outcome, especially when it involves love we ought to examine why we feel so empty with out this person. We need to look inside and develop self-love, more self worth and confidence. There is nothing outside of us. Everything emanates from within.
If we don’t have enough love for ourselves we will never truly find love outside of ourselves with another person. It will never be enough. We will consume the other person in an attempt to fill the void within ourselves and eventually push the other person away.
Holding thoughts means we aren’t living in the present
When you “hold thoughts” about something happening your aren’t living in the present moment. You’re postponing your happiness until this “thing” happens, whether it is the return of your soul mate or the winning of the lottery.
When you aren’t living in the present moment, you aren’t really living. Examine your desires and if you believe you are attached to a particular outcome and “holding thoughts” about it let them go. One big clue that you are holding thoughts is constant vacillation between faith and fear. One minute your positive you’re getting back together and walking on air and the next minute you’re completely down in the dumps.
Allow the Universe to provide you with your highest good or something better
Focus on the feelings having what you desire would bring to your life such as joy, love and abundance instead of upon one specific outcome. Let the Universe do its job, infuse your future with the “creative spark” and be delighted by the outcome.
You’ll be glad you did!
Have you ever found yourself stubbornly “holding thoughts?” What outcome were you attached to? How did it turn out?
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P.S. Learn how to tap into your intuition and get the guidance you need: Start here!