Do you find it difficult to stay positive when you’re surrounded by negativity?
I’m opening up the Powered by Intuition Mailbag to share the answer to a question from a reader who asked how she “could stay positive and in a state of gratitude when she was surrounded by negativity.“
If you’re living in the midst of a situation that’s negative it’s very hard to stay upbeat and positive all the time.
And whether it’s in your home, workplace or within a social group it’s going to affect you.
The way to rise above the negativity is to become conscious that you have a choice in how you react. The moment you become aware that you don’t have to react to negativity your mind has expanded.
When I first began my journey with personal development and found out that I didn’t have to think the thoughts that just “popped” into my head but could CHOOSE my thoughts, it blew my mind! Wow!
You could almost hear the “screech marks” as the wild negative and sabotaging thoughts came to a halt in my mind that very instant.
“You mean I can decide what I’m going to think about,” I thought? This was a revelation.
So, what I want to say to you is that the first step in overcoming anything in your life always begins with mastering your thoughts. Everything we do in life begins on the “inside.”
Now you might be thinking, “That’s hard!”
And, I won’t sugar coat it….it is hard. You have to want it – bad. You have to desire to change more than you desire to stay stuck where you are in the negativity of whatever the situation is.
You also have to be disciplined and commit to doing it and be consistent about doing it.
Here are 5 steps to maintain your positivity when you’re around negative people:
1. To shield yourself from absorbing negativity focus on the things you’re grateful for in your life. To do that though, you must first “interrupt” the thoughts that have taken control of your mind.
2. To do this use what’s called a “pattern interrupt.” This is when you deliberately take an action to switch gears on your thinking. Using this is like applying the “brakes” to a runaway train.
When you take control of the train you can direct it to go where you want to go. And this is exactly what you want to do with your thinking; take control of it. When you’re in control and direct it you consciously decide what you want in your life rather than being a victim of life and taking whatever comes along.
3. Pick a prayer you like or a mantra you know well. I like using either the “Lord’s Prayer,” or a mantra from “Ho’oponopono” which is, “I’m sorry. Forgive me. Thank you. I love you,” when I want to interrupt and halt a negative thought pattern that’s stampeding through my mind.
Depending on the situation I might use this mantra from Sahaja Yoga instead: “I forgive. I forgive everyone including myself.”
4. Once you take back control of your mind and calm down again you can think rationally about the situation and decide how to respond and what you’re going to do rather than react on autopilot. You can take an inventory and see how much good there really is in your life and focus on that instead. Remember what you focus on expands.
As you make a habit out of interrupting the negative thought patterns you’ll also be breaking the “circuit”
that has you automatically become upset.
5. Overriding the body’s stress response means you’re mastering your thoughts. You’re now fully conscious to the process that was hijacking your mind and can put a stop to it. That’s being a victor instead of a victim.
If you use one of these steps you’ll get your mind off of the negativity and start to neutralize the negative emotions that are activating the stress response in your body eventually. I say eventually because without a technique to reset the nervous system’s ingrained response it’s going to take longer.
When the stress response (fight or flight response) in your body is triggered you feel anxious, scared, overwhelmed, upset and fearful and you’re ready to react at a hair trigger.
You’re body pumps cortisol into your bloodstream to prepare you for a “fight or flight” so you can protect yourself from danger. If this same “danger” (what you’re calling a negative environment/person) appears in your life again and again your “fight or flight” response will be set off at the mere sight or thought of this negativity. This powerful reaction becomes ingrained within your nervous system and hijacks your emotions and behavior unconsciously.
When this happens you’ll have an uphill battle trying to maintain your positivity because it’s no longer just a “mental” challenge to change your thinking but a physically ingrained habit within your nervous system that you have to restore to “neutral.” The fastest way to reset the response from your nervous system is to use EFT (Emotional Freedom Techniques) or Tapping.
Are you surrounded by a negative situation or people you can’t get away from? How are you dealing with it?
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P.S. Learn how to use your intuition to successfully create a life you love: Click here.
Ready to tap into your wealth vibe?
If you have ever found it difficult to increase your financial abundance read on. This interview with Daylle Deanna Schwartz, co-author of, “Tapping Into Wealth” by Margaret M. Lynch may be just what you need to charge-up your own wealth vibe. Daylle sent me a copy of Tapping Into Wealth which, I not only loved but found most helpful.
Daylle has become an expert in applying this modality and has a lot of knowledge to share with us about this miraculous technique! (She was also kind enough to mention me and Powered by Intuition in the dedication section of the book. Thank you Daylle).
1. Daylle tell us what EFT is?
EFT (Emotional Freedom Techniques), also called Tapping, is a technique used to heal emotions.
It’s one of the most powerful and effective mind/body techniques for clearing emotional blocks that keep you from achieving what you want. It dissolves resistance that keeps the Law of Attraction from working at full capacity. Tapping was developed based on the idea of acupuncture, which has been used to clear energy blocks to heal health issues for thousands of years in Chinese medicine.
It was discovered that if you use acupressure by tapping lightly with your fingertips on acupuncture points, you can make a shift in unconscious beliefs and negative emotions that block getting what you want. To do Tapping, express your feelings as you tap lightly on specific acupuncture points, using two fingers (or more) with either hand, or both hands. The more you express your feelings, the more blocks that keep you from getting what you want you can clear.
2. Why does it work?
Medical doctors now recognize that our bodies have a kind of electrical system that flows through it. In Eastern philosophy this is called the meridian system and the energy is called chi. If the chi flows how it should along the meridian, it keeps your body is in a natural state of well-being. In Western medicine, this electrical system has been studied as interacting with the fight or flight system, the sympathetic nervous system in the body.
When you start tapping on specific acupuncture points, you can actually flip a switch and turn off an old memory, or something that scares you, like having to face your boss about a stressful issue, dealing with someone you dislike, or something that makes you angry or sad. Tapping disconnects the thought from the autonomic nervous reaction in the body, which means the negative emotions dissipate and get calmer.
3. How has learning EFT benefited your life?
My career escalated when I began tapping to clear my blocks to making more money as I wrote the book and did the exercises. It helped me to recognize what was blocking my ability to manifest more wealth. It also helps me to heal physical problems when I tap on having good health and why I hate having the ailment.
I tap before I put goals into motion to help me achieve them. After I tapped on getting The Self-Love Movement™ off the ground, I got a lot of support. I recently tapped on getting the money to make a video to promote self-love, and shortly after got info about grants for people helping to make a difference in the world. I tapped when I sent n my application and won the grant for it.
4. Why does tapping work to help overcome money issues?
We accumulate unconscious blocks to making lots of money, especially in childhood, where we absorb negative messages about money from our parents. For example, my mom went from very solvent to broke when she was a little girl. Because of that she was always scared to spend money and would tell me, “You can never have enough money.” So I was focused on having enough. And that’s all I got. Now I focus on having more than enough!
You might have a hidden agenda driving your goal—wanting to make more money to prove your worth to someone who doubts you that gets in the way. And there are many more potential blocks explained in the book The stronger the emotions you express when Tapping, the more fuel you give it, like using the Law of Attraction to manifest. I often scream and use cuss words when trying to clear something painful or that I very much don’t want. Clearing these blocks and old beliefs can allow you to attract more money!
5. Can you share a quick exercise for how to use EFT to increase wealth?
Close your eyes and picture yourself around age six or seven. Take a nice deep breath and see your parents talking about and dealing with money or bills. What are they saying? How do your parents seem to feel about money? What negative feelings did they have? Were they worried about money? Or fighting? Was there never enough? Did they express negative feelings about people who have a lot of money? Those could be your subconscious blocks. Then do Tapping to clear your parent’s view of money. Acknowledge that they’re not yours and you don’t want them. Then do a positive round about what you want.
6. Why would you recommend learning Tapping?
Because it works! Besides tapping for money, you can use it for your health, to attract romance, to get over fear, guilt and doubt, to get rid of a phobia, to calm food cravings. It’s been used to help military personnel returning from war with PTSD. I use it with clients to clear their blocks for loving themselves and stopping their old people pleasing ways.
7. What is your next project?
Taking The Self-Love Movement™ to the next level. And I’m writing a book called, 101 Ways to Enjoy Getting Older.
What questions do you have for Daylle? Have you ever tried EFT? Tell us about your experience.
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P.S. Learning to use your intuition will help you identify where you are blocked and where to apply EFT: Click here.
Daylle Deanna Schwartz is a speaker, self-empowerment counselor (using Tapping as a tool) via phone/Skype, and best-selling author of 15 books, including Nice Girls Can Finish First, Tapping Into Wealth and All Men Are Jerks until Proven Otherwise. She is founder of The Self-Love Movement™ at HowDoILoveMe.com, where she has a pledge to make a 31 Days of Self-Love Commitment and is giving her 13th book, How Do I Love Me? Let Me Count the Ways, for free. Daylle writes Lessons from a Recovering DoorMat, a column on Beliefnet. She has had over 500 TV and radio appearances, including Oprah, Good Morning America and Howard Stern and been quoted in dozens of publications, including The New York Times. You can also find her at: http://www.daylle.com and: http://howdoiloveme.com .
Pick up your copy of Tapping Into Wealth on Amazon.
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