The #1 Mistake You’ve Been Making That Blocks Your Intuition
Have you ever made a decision based on a fear that if you didn’t do this one thing you’d miss out on something?
If you relate to this story you might be making this mistake too.
A coaching client* mentioned that she was having doubts about a man she was in the early stages of a relationship with.
This lovely woman was divorced and happy to be free from a terrible marriage. After her divorce she moved clear across the country to get as far away from her ex as possible. She loved her new home, neighbors and job and met a nice new man not long after moving.
Things seemed to be perfect at first. He was a widower with several grown children living near the Gulf Coast. He loved his family and spoke about how close they all were. They had many interests in common and he was respectful and took things slow which my client appreciated. He was worldly, having traveled to many different countries and had many stories to share. He loved the opera and the arts and volunteering at charity organizations.
She was in heaven! Who had sent this angel of a man to her?
Since meeting him she had been coaching with me to find her life purpose. She wanted to create a new life that she loved now that she’d escaped her unhappy marriage. During our sessions she’d been updating me on her progress with him.
Every session she asked me if I got any “vibes” about him.
I did. And, they weren’t good. I didn’t see it being a “happily ever after scenario.”
I got the feeling that he was hiding things from her and that he wasn’t what he appeared to be. I also got a strong feeling that she should be very cautious with him.
As it turned out one day he picked up and moved to the Gulf Coast. He told her via text that he missed his children and decided to move back to where they lived. She was disappointed but, I was relieved.
She attributed his inability to be open and share with her as a sign of caring for her feelings. She believed he had been planning on moving back to where his children lived for some time and that he hadn’t told her to spare her feelings.
I saw what he had done as devious and very controlling. He toyed with her and then left her flat. I didn’t like the vibes I got from that at all.
A few weeks later she told me that she’d been texting with him since he moved. He wants her to come and visit him but not right now……he is quite busy, he says, because the g-men are after him. Years ago he got into trouble with the law and ever since he has been hounded by the government so, he has to keep a low profile and keep on moving and cannot even see his children.
Okay, now I have to call a spade a spade right so I say, “This person is a paranoid weirdo. Cut off all contact – now!”
“But, what if it’s true? Except for this he is really nice.”
Now this is where the #1 Intuition blocking mistake comes in……
“Tell me,” I ask, “what does your gut say about him?”
“Well, it sounds kind of fishy to me too.”
“How fishy?” I ask.
“Mmm, pretty fishy – like whack job fishy.” She pauses and then says, “I texted him back after a couple of days of this stuff and told him I didn’t believe him.”
“So, then why are you considering keeping the lines of communication open?” I ask.
“‘Cause maybe, you know, he might be telling the truth and there are a lot of things about him I like.”
And there is the #1 Mistake: Fear of Missing Out on Something
What was happening was that my client was afraid that she was going to miss out if she let this guy go. She was letting her fear and belief in lack override her intuition – which was right on the money. Instead of believing in herself and her worthiness and that there are plenty of fish in the sea she is holding onto to this one stinky fish!
She knew what her gut was saying was true all along or she wouldn’t have kept asking me what my vibes were on this guy. She didn’t want to be right. If she was right she would have to walk away from someone who was paying attention to her.
See how we deceive ourselves when we make the #1 mistake that blocks our intuition: Fear missing out on something?
3 Tips to avoid making the #1 mistake that blocks your intuition:
1. Get clear on why you want what you want. Ask yourself if you’re attached to the outcome? If so why?
2. Trust your gut. It always knows! If you feel something is amiss it is, whether you can prove it or not. That’s your spidey sense.
3. Never do something because you fear that if you don’t you’ll miss out and never get another chance. When we make any decision from a place of fear instead of confidence and strength our judgement is compromised.
How have you been blocking your intuition by being afraid you’ll miss out. Is it really true? Will you miss out? Share in the comment section.
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P.S. Hone your intuition – click here!
*The client’s personal details have been changed to protect her privacy.
Photo credit: © MediablitzImages – Fotolia.com
“Intuition is a spiritual faculty and does not explain, but simply points the way.” –Frances Scovel Shinn
You can use your intuition to lead you to a life you love. All it takes is letting go and trusting your inner voice.
During a session a client commented that when reviewing her past mistakes in life she was able to identify a pattern of ignoring her intuition. Whenever she had ignored her intuition and relied solely on the rational mind to make a decision it had not turned out well.
The reason she had ignored her intuition and not followed its guidance was because she was afraid of what might happen if she followed it.
By far, the biggest reason why people ignore their intuition and end up making bad decisions and wrong choices is because they are fearful of letting go and trusting their intuition.
I know through my own experience that not listening to my intuition is what put me on the wrong path in my life. It was only when I finally let go of the fear and “took the leap of faith” and began listening to it that my life began to change for the better.
When we won’t let go and fear trusting our inner guidance it is because we want to “control” the outcome.
The problem with control is that we also limit the possibilities of what may happen when we try so hard to be in control of things.
You might think that the only solution is “X” but, what if letting go means that you set off a new chain of events that leads to an unexpected and even better solution? Wouldn’t you want that instead?
Letting go and letting your intuition lead you is the way to set off the new chain of events that leads to those fortunate coincidences and door opening opportunities.
When you take a leap of faith to follow your intuition the Universe will catch you and gently place you on the road that leads straight to your heart’s desire.
Here’s a wonderful account of how listening to intuition led Janet Brent straight to her heart’s desire and to a wonderful new life:
When I was smack in my mid-twenties “quarter-life crisis”, I made a decision that would change the course of my life by breaking up my five year long-term relationship to the man I thought I’d marry. I realized how much of a sham stability is and knew I needed to work on loving myself and finding my passions. I told myself I would need two years to be completely single, without the bullshit of dating. Feeling very lost amidst the crying fits, I wondered what to do next.
A quiet voice that I call my inner intuition told me to move back to the Philippines, my home country where I was born. Having grown up in the Pacific Northwest since the age of 3, this seemed like a crazy idea and I wasn’t sure how I was ever going to pull it off. That whisper in my head wouldn’t go away and a year later, I stepped on the plane to follow my heart. I had no plans, but I made a “bucket list” of things I wanted to do. A handful of those things were crossed off without actively searching, but many came as opportunities practically handed to me!
“Join a Zen Buddhist
temple to practice meditation” came about when I was about to start a new work-from-home head hunter job that didn’t satisfy my passion. I asked for guidance and for a sign that following my intuition to turn it down was the right thing to do. Show me a better opportunity and I’ll take it. The next day, I noticed a link to the Buddhist retreat in the Philippines while viewing a friend’s Facebook profile. Live and stay at a temple for four months FREE. It was a no brainer for someone with “no plans” with a one-way ticket and no savings/very little funds. “Stop eating meat for a long period of time” would also be crossed off my bucket list.
“Learn Filipino Martial Arts
” came about when a co-retreat member introduced me to a martial arts teacher who I ended up walking 660 km with on a tropical island. This experience came directly after the retreat where I had asked to find a spiritual partner. Feeling like my life was starting to seem like “Eat Pray Love
“, I knew that “love” was coming soon. The day we first took our friendship to the next level was two years exact to the date of my breakup/singleversary.
Amazing intuitive experiences came during our walk. Things like declaring I wanted my own bottle of ice cold water, in a provincial area where buying ice cold Coke is much more available, and then manifesting it that same night when we reached a bigger town and a villager decided to give us an ice cold bottle water in exchange for the massage my partner freely gave. He also gave us a rare rice delicacy that my partner was craving all day. On another occasion, the universe even answered when I wanted to drink! The group who hosted our shelter for the night were drinking rounds of gin and this was the only night in our trip when our hosts were drinking.
Another night, we had stopped by a beachside hut and I looked with longing at the other side of a private fenced area next to ours which had a bigger, much more comfortable hut that I wanted to sleep in. A tent was there but I wasn’t sure if anyone was in it.
While my partner was meditating and making intentions to give us help for the night and a vegetarian meal, an old man who was tasked not to let anyone in the beach property came out of the tent and was drawn towards the ocean where my partner was meditating. After talking together, my partner received an intuitive message that wouldn’t have made sense to just anyone, but made stunning sense to the old man. “Don’t worry about your son, he still loves you.” When the man heard the message he decided to take us in, cooked us a vegetarian meal of seaweed and rice (for me) plus sardines (for them), and let us sleep in the bigger hut that I wanted to sleep in.
I feel constantly blessed by how life has guided me and I continue to use techniques for manifesting and affirmations.
Thank you for sharing this with us Janet!
Are you afraid of taking an intuitive leap into a life you love? Answer these 8 question to help you identify what’s holding you back from following your intuition:
1. Review some of your biggest mistakes in life – things you wish you could “do over” if you had the chance.
2. Do you recall having an intuitive sense to to do something else at the time you made those decisions, that you ignored?
3. What did you want to do instead that you didn’t do?
4. How might your life be different now if you had followed your intuition?
5. Can you see a theme or pattern to your mistakes? What is it?
6. Why did you ignore your intuition – what outcome were you trying to secure? For examples was your goal to maintain your safety and security, to avoid challenging yourself or looking stupid or due to fear of failure or fear of success?
7. Is this theme or pattern still running your life today? How is it holding it you back?
8. What is your intuition telling you to do next or what has it been nagging at you to do recently?
9. What if you did it? Think about the myriad of ways your life could change if you followed this guidance.
10. Can you find a way to “take a test run” of the intuitive prompt you’re getting? Can you make some phone calls or do some research to see if it is doable in you life?
11. Act for one day as if you have taken the leap. How does it feel? What do you envision happening after you take the leap of faith to follow your intuition?
Sometimes you need to “act as if” you are going to follow through on your hunch and then in the process your fear will diminish and you will find that you are ready to take that leap. Calling it “practice” or a “test drive” is much less frightening.
Where are you stuck in your life? Can you see how ignoring your intuition has made your life “smaller?” What will you differently now?
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P.S. Want to learn more about how to use your intuition to create a life you love? Click here.
Janet is a graphic/web design intuitive for indies and entrepreneurs in the holistic and creative arts. Her passion for building her business, working with other passionate people, and making positive change is only the beginning of more extraordinary things to come. As a “professional hobo”–homeward bound in her motherland after spending all her life in the Pacific Northwest of Portland, Oregon–she now resides in the concrete jungle of Manila, Philippines. You can find her marching to her own beat at Purple Panda or tweeting up a storm @janetbrent
Day 21: Is there a difference between following your heart and following your gut?
Day 22: The Inner Technology of Intuition
Day 22: Intuition is an Ability Natural to All
Day 23: How to Attract the Life You Dream Of Plus a Giveaway!
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