This is a guest post for Powered by Intuition by Stuart Mills
Our inner voice is our connection to the universe and the key to unlocking all of your heart’s desires. And yet, do you believe this?
We have a lot of scepticism and doubt over whether our inner voice (commonly known as our ‘instinct’ or ‘gut feeling’) can actually be useful to us. After all, it seems to be telling us that we should think about changing careers, yet why would we want to leave our comfortable, well-paid job? Or it may be telling us that a change of location is needed, yet all our friends are where we currently are, and it seems crazy to move away.
This inner talk is not that of mental chatter or our limiting beliefs surfacing, it’s the deepest part of our being. Our inner voice is the link to the infinite grace of the universe, where we could be truly happy if we only allow it to happen.
But instead of valuing our inner voice, we let our limiting beliefs, gained from others, run the show. We decide that it doesn’t make sense for us to ‘follow our hearts’, so we ignore it in the hopes that it will leave us alone. But it never will.
Three Reasons Why
To elaborate, here are three reasons why we don’t listen to our inner voice:
1. We Trust Our Inner Chatter Too Much
As already mentioned, the inner voice is not the thought process in our heads. Our inner voice is born with us, and wishes to guide us towards our true path and nature. Our thought process, however, is acquired over time through the experiences in our lives, and the beliefs that we pick up.
These experiences and beliefs serve to lead us away from our inner calling – we’re repeatedly given messages that the world is not as wholesome and peaceful as we previously thought. Conflict, stress, and criticism all hinder our natural flow, and we develop limiting thoughts and beliefs as an expression of what we think the world is really like.
Our ‘inner talk’ is not born with us, it is acquired. Therefore, we existed before our limiting thoughts and beliefs came along. What existed with us, what came into life at the same time as us, is our inner voice that wishes to guide and direct us.
Yet, instead of trusting this calling, we ignore it and trust a mental process that restricts and shackles us. It seems logical to trust something that is constantly ‘there’, in our minds. We identify with this mental thought process, and continue to live our lives based on what it tells us.
When this happens, we are trusting our mental chatter too much. We are giving up our unique identity and establishing ourselves in the limiting behaviours that have been set by others. It’s little wonder that we aren’t happy living like this.
2. We’re Afraid To Take Risks
When we think of the word ‘risk’, we’re likely to think of ‘danger’, or ‘discomfort’, or ‘adventure’, or even ‘stupidity’. Risk is not associated with being ‘natural’, or living true to your path. Yet that’s exactly what risk is.
To us, taking a qualification for a new career, or trying for another baby, or living on our own for the first time, or going on vacation for the first time, can seem daunting. It can feel like we’re on our own, swimming in a sea of uncertainty, and our sense of control is low. But the reason why we’re doing this risky thing is not to scare ourselves or to annoy other people – it’s because we’re listening, and we’re following our inner voice.
To take a risk implies that we ‘step out of our comfort zone’, yet all that’s happening is that we’re listening to our inner calling, something we very rarely do. That’s why it seems so scary – we’re too used to living out of our heads, and doing what other people say we should do.
Because we’ve conditioned ourselves to play it safe and listen to the limits of others, doing what our inner voice tells us has become risky and daunting. We become afraid to take risks because we just aren’t used to listening to our inner voice, and so the less often we listen to it, the less often we’re inclined to listen to it.
3. Nobody Else Seems To Listen To Their Inner Voice, So Why Should We?
The accepted prerogative aim of society is to do what others are doing, and follow in their footsteps.
If our parents got married in a certain way, then we may be inclined to follow their lead, perhaps even getting married in the same church. If our friends have all been to university, then we may be inclined to go to university too, even if we have no desire to gain a degree. Following in other people’s footsteps, whether they be of our friends, family, peers, or what the media tell you to do, is seen as normal and ‘safe’.
The inner voice is not safe, because it’s not designed to be safe. It’s meant to lead us to our true potential and our best lives, away from the crowd.
But instead of listening, we choose to look at what other people are doing, and follow their lead. We convince ourselves it’s better this way because no-one will single us out for being ‘different’ or ‘weird’ – we don’t trust ourselves to act in our own interests, so we go with what the crowd suggest, whether that’s buying the latest phone or computer, or eating at the ‘coolest’ places.
By doing this, we sacrifice who we are for the sake of apparent comfort. It’s the ultimate betrayal.
Listen To Your Inner Voice By Taking A Risk
To listen to your inner voice, you need to stop listening to the crowd. You can’t listen to both at the same time.
Learn to take a risk and do what you truly want to do, rather than what someone else says you should do. Despite the fact your parents wanted you to be this or that, you must sacrifice their wants for your own. Despite the fact your teacher said you could never be something, you must sacrifice their opinions for your own.
Take a risk, step out from the crowd, and stop paying attention to that inner chatter. Learn to listen to one voice alone – your voice. It’s the only one that stays with you from beginning to end.
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Who is Stuart Mills? Millions of people worldwide are restricted from living the life of their dreams by the limiting beliefs that control them. If you want to break those limiting beliefs and live life your way, then visit Stuart Mills at Limitless Believing (http://www.limitlessbelieving.com)
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Great post Angela! This is so true, esp. the chatter inside our heads. I’ve had a lot of that lately! It seems to take over if I wake up in the middle of the night. Thanks for the reminders!
Hey Betsy,
Perhaps the voices that come in the middle of the night are reminding you of a problem you’re harbouring? Or of something you’ve repressed? The one good thing about the inner chatter is that they remind us of something that needs to be addressed 🙂
So true! As I was reading your post, I thought about when I adopted my last daughter. Everyone said I couldn’t and shouldn’t. I even still have an email from an expert telling me “this will never, never happen.” Well, she has been my daughter now for almost 6 years! So there you go.
If you are content within yourself Galen, then that is all that matters!
Thanks for sharing, and congratulations on the past 6 years 🙂
i have many experience regarding to listen the inner voice
yes,usually when we start to listen it,it would be opposites from many things around us…it happened on me that i lost some of my best friends,because they want to control my path which is definitely far away from it supposed to be for me…
another time when i didnt listen,i trapped into the problem that i already know it will happened eventually…there’s a lot of experience but yes day by day i know that my inner voice always guides me to the right one…i dont care if i have to walk the other way around from the majority of people,as long the result is the best one afterward for me
I think the result, which will be at the end after all else, is what matters Deniya.
When we’re at the end of our lives, and we look back at what has been, shall we ask why we didn’t listen to more people, or shall we ask why we didn’t listen to ourselves more?
Thanks for commenting 🙂
The paragraph on listening to our “inner chatter” rather than that true inner voice was just the most helpful thing I have read in years! It really hit me over the head in a big way to give me guidelines on how to tell the difference between the “chatter” and THE VOICE! I am SO indebted to you for sending us this post!
That is absolutely wonderful to hear Rose, thank you for the kind words! Much love to you 🙂
So true. I would say the two top reasons are fear–of making the wrong decision/taking risk but also because we were “trained” to listen to reason and not be “flighty.” I remember when I was a teen I wanted to be an artist. But I was discouraged becasue it was not “practical.” While our parents meant well—wanted us to have a rewarding life, they were so programmed to plan for the “American Dream” that they stopped listening to their inner voices which is why most never attained that dream. I think the real lesson is that we should not do that to our children. We should support their dreams no matter how impractical it may seem.
It makes me wonder Rosemarie, just what the American Dream is actually made up of? As a Englishman, I could never claim to fully understand, what would it mean that we follow our hearts to our passion, even if that means losing so much of our security? Or does it mean that we hoard what we have and strive for ‘bigger and better’ in our lives?
Thanks for commenting!
Growing up I was labelled as “weird” and “different” by my family and kids I went to school with for dressing and acting differently and basically being myself. Rather than being ashamed, I was proud and wore the label like a badge of honor.
In college and the seven years afterward, I did what I thought I was supposed to do. Then one day I woke up and realized it had nothing to do with my heart’s desire. So I left and found myself.
Trust your inner voice. Follow it. You’ll never regret it.
Great post Stu!
If I’m hearing you correctly Paige, you listened to your inner voice when you were in school and was proud of it. Then, you began to disregard your intuition for the voices of others.
Interesting that you went this route, because I took the opposite. As I mentioned to Fran, I didn’t begin listening to my inner voice until I was 21/22 – school was an uncomfortable period for me. But, it’s never to late to begin listening!
Thanks for commenting Paige!
Great post, Stuart!
I don’t listen to my inner voice that much as I “think” that my inner is always “negative”. I always want to stay positive all time.
I’d like to take as much(calculated) risks as possible in my life and nothing gonna hold me back because life is short, why stay in the comfort zone? Let’s explore and enjoy the beautiful universe! 🙂
Regards,
Dennis.
Interesting that you mention ‘calculated risks’ Dennis – what would you classify as calculated risks? I have my own opinion, but I’d love to lear yours!
Thanks for commenting 🙂
Stu,
I think that I first heard the terms ‘the still small voice’ when I was 8 years old in Sunday School. It has stuck with me my entire life. It’s my soul speaking to me. I try to remember that it’s the source of my wisdom, my higher self.
You have offered some fine scenarios of when our intuition is begging us to listen. My favorite? No one is listening to their inner voice so why should I? When I was younger I did more than my fair share of this. Hopefully, experience has made me more skillful in dealing with any type of ‘naysaying’.
Stu, Your writing is both to the point and sublime….an unusual combination. Fran
Fran, thank you for the kind words. I’m happy that you think my writing is an unusual combination 😉
I also did my fair share of ‘intuition ignorance’ when I was younger – it wasn’t until I was 21/22 when I first started to pay attention to that inner voice that was begging to be heard. The more I’ve listened to him, the louder he’s gotten!
Stu, Stu! Love to read your posts. Yes, nothing risked, nothing gained. Most of us let fear hold us back – we don’t want to face an undesirable outcome. As Angela pointed out in an earlier post – we also tend to ignore our inner voice because of a lack of self-esteem. Sometimes, a life experience can prevent us from trusting ourselves. Luckily we can change all that.
Beautifully written as always, Stu. Thank you, Angela for yet another amazing guest.
Thank you for the kind words Vidya! You’ve always offered me a lot of support and I truly appreciate it.
You’re right – we can change our life despite what our prior experiences tell us. A newer, positive experience can replace an older, negative experience 🙂
Hi Stu and Angela,
Absolutely, I listen to it. Mind you, I didn’t ALWAYS do so…in fact, just yesterday I had a big decision to make and I spent 1/2 a day fighting it until I gave in to what I knew was right the whole time. I viewed it as a wake-up call as to how I had been going about things…that needs to change. I know that if I do not listen to my intuition and what my team is trying to tell me, I will be lost. No need to get lost – or go back to the “tried and true but not you” – there is nothing to be gained there.
Indeed Julie, it’s amazing how, despite all the time we may choose to spend thinking about it, the initial ‘instinctive’ answer is often the best option for us to take. It may not be the ‘right’ option, but it’s the best one for us at the time.
Malcolm Gladwell writes about this in ‘Blink’, it’s a highly-recommended book.
Thanks for commenting!
Thank you for contributing this wonderful guest post Stuart.
My pleasure Angela, thank you for giving me the opportunity to write for you again 🙂