Are there some goals you just can’t achieve no matter how hard you try?
Or if you do achieve them it doesn’t last or something happens and it all falls apart? If you said yes then it’s time to use your intuition to uncover your sabotaging beliefs.
Most goals fall under these common categories: Career, Finance, Health & Wellness, Relationships.
What’s most frustrating is when you are able to create success in a few of these areas but not all.
For example you might excel in the areas of Career, Finance and Health but not at experiencing the joy of happy, deep, meaningful relationships. Or perhaps you have wonderful loving supportive relationships and enjoy perfect health and fitness but you can’t for the life of you seem to create lasting financial prosperity. It may be that you have great relationships, financial success and great health but not a career you love….it’s just a paycheck albeit, a healthy sized one. In another example it may be you experience success in all areas except for your health; perhaps you just can’t lose the weight no matter how hard you try?
Does this sound familiar?
These are not an uncommon patterns. When we are not experiencing joy and fulfillment in one area of our lives this is big blaring SIGN that we need to pay closer attention to it. It’s likely that this is an established pattern in our lives.
If you resonate to having one or more challenging categories right now think back over your life and review your experiences in these particular areas. Is it a pattern? Yes? Then something’s going on under the surface that you need to examine now in order to experience success in this area in the future.
It’s likely you have some deeply ingrained limiting beliefs running in your consciousness that sabotage your success in this area of life.
Example of a Sabotaging Belief in Operation:
You’ve taken a new job. It’s a great next move in your career. Based on your previous accomplishments the divisional manager promised you a team manager position as soon as it opens up. You work diligently and do all the right things but you can’t seem to close a deal no matter how hard you try even though you brought in new business constantly at your old job. Every time you’re close to getting a new customer the deal disintegrates. You’re falling behind on your numbers and this is taking a toll on your confidence. Now you fear you won’t get the promised promotion when it opens up.
What’s going on? You ask for intuitive guidance and meditate on the issue.
After getting still a memory surfaces that helps you get to the heart of why you seem to be sabotaging your career.
Suddenly you “see” yourself back in grammar school. You’re running for class president of the sixth grade. It’s your turn to get up in front of the class and give your speech about why they should vote for you. You created a presentation that includes writing your campaign promises on the black board for emphasis. As you back up toward the blackboard you crash into the plant stand next to your teacher’s desk and fall backward knocking it over spilling dirt on yourself and everywhere. You’re mortified! And you’re not elected to 6th grade class president.
This memory leads to a realization that you are afraid to take a leadership position because you might embarrass yourself. You recall thinking at that moment that, “It’s safer not to stand out. From now on I’ll never volunteer to go in front of the class again!”
You go back into this memory and rewrite it. You see your eleven year old self stepping backward toward the blackboard but being aware that the plant stand was there. You avoid the plant stand, easily maneuver around it, write your campaign promises on the blackboard without a hitch and you become the next class president.
Now you can think about what happened without wincing in embarrassment. Your free to step up and stand out! The unconscious fear that held you back is gone.
The next week at work you close several new deals and a few months later when the team leader position opens up you’re promoted.
See how this decision to “not stand out” made decades earlier still runs the show?
How to Root Out A Sabotaging Belief:
1. Go within. Go somewhere you won’t be disturbed and get quiet and still. When you feel calm and ready ask your higher self or God, the universe, guides (whatever feels right to you) to help you tune into what’s going on under the surface.
2. Ask for memory about this pattern. Relax and listen to the first thought you have or watch the pictures that surface in your mind. Some people are more attuned to “listening” and others to “seeing.” Neither is right nor wrong.
3. Grab onto the memory. What happened? Who was involved? How did it make you feel? What snap decisions did you make as a result of this experience?
4. Do you experience a high degree of emotional upset when reviewing this past event? If so this is a sure sign you’ve correctly identified the right memory.
5. Review the decision you made. Did you make a promise to yourself in that moment? Ask for intuitive guidance about this decision. What feels right is usually correct. The decisions you made in the instant you were experiencing emotional turbulence are likely to have become the sabotaging beliefs that are now preventing you from achieving success in this area.
6. Rewrite the past. At any given moment there are innumerable possibilities to step into. You could have chosen differently in the past and that would have resulted in an entirely different future. Tell yourself that you made the best choice you could back then but it’s time to let it go. Thank your younger self for trying to protect you but tell him/her you’ll take over from here. Now go back now and change the memory.
Choose a different reality. See yourself making different decisions in that moment. Erase the old memory and replace it with the new one in which you made positive choices. Tell yourself that is now what you’ll remember about that day.
7. Test out the new memory. Replay the new scene you installed a few times. How do you feel now? Try to recall the old memory. If you feel removed from it and the high level of emotion you experienced earlier has subsided you’ve successfully collapsed the memory. You should now feel free and more energized and you’ll begin to notice things changing for the better in that area of life.
Do you have one area of life where things aren’t working? What limiting beliefs are holding you back?
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P.S. Learn to easily tune into your intuition for answers. Learn more: Click here
Photo credit: Fotolia ©Maridav
Intuition: 11 Great Reasons to Develop It
There are so many good reasons to develop your intuition in addition to hearing your own inner guidance more clearly.
Setting the intention to connect daily to your intuition leads to a reduction in the distracting, fearful and often sabotaging voices in your mind. That allows the true voice of your own inner wisdom to surface above the noise.
Tuning in to your inner wisdom helps you find your purpose in life, develop better boundaries and say “no,” feel joyful and more satisfied, reduce stress levels, have better focus, less worry and more peace of mind and improve memory and decision-making to name just some of the benefits I wrote about in my best selling book, “The Intuition Principle.”
Another benefit of developing your intuition is gaining a greater sense of your own power.
Developing your intuition brings clarity around who you really are and what you were meant to do in this life. When you’re aligned with your purpose you become clear on your value and that leads to to greater self empowerment.
When you’re self empowered you take action toward your goals and become an advocate for yourself to ensure that you live a fulfilling and meaningful life and living up to your full potential. You stop looking outside of yourself and relying on others to advocate for you or to make you happy or fill you up. You become self reliant, self sufficient and completely whole in every sense of the word. You take responsibility for every aspect of your life.
Realizing that your purpose benefits others helps you become more confident in yourself. Having more confidence means you falter less in your decision making and make progress more easily toward achieving your goals.
Confidence also comes from hearing your inner guidance clearly and successfully following it. Each time you follow your intuition and it leads to a successful outcome you develop greater faith, trust and confidence in yourself.
More Confidence and Self empowerment
When you feel empowered you take more action to achieve your goals and taking more action is what leads to success. Your less “confused, and stuck in overwhelm” because you have a clear sense of where you want to go and the confidence that you can get there. You’re not held back by insecurities of “not knowing what to do.”
Self empowerment gives you the confidence to know that you’ll take the right action to learn how to do what you need to do to get it done. You’re not always waiting for something outside of yourself to “get started.” When you lack confidence and feel disempowered you’re always in a “getting ready to get ready mode” instead of actually starting something. “Getting ready to get ready” is the illusion of thinking you’re doing something.
When you’re not clear on your purpose and the value you bring to the world you feel indecisive and shaky when making decisions. You do all sorts of things like “busywork” that don’t actually amount to anything because you’re unsure of what to do. This lack clarity and confusion on what action to take next is a vicious cycle of not being sure and either doing the same things over and over again or suddenly changing directions without putting any real thought into it. This cycle of feeling so unsure of yourself and doubting your direction, purpose and value are really disempowering and just ends up making you feeling worse.
The way out of this vicious cycle is to go within and build a strong connection to your inner wisdom; your intuition and letting it guide you. Working on your intuition is a practice of staying ever present and being mindful.
11 Reasons to Develop Your Intuition:
1. Reduction in the distracting, fearful and often sabotaging voices in your mind.
2. Tuning in to your inner wisdom helps you find your purpose in life
3. Develop better boundaries and be able to say “no.”
4. Feel joyful and more satisfied with your life
5. Reduced stress levels
6. Have better focus
7. Less worry and more peace of mind
8. Improved memory
9. Better at decision-making
10. Increases confidence
11. Become more empowered
Have you noticed these benefits from developing your intuition? Share with us how developing your intuition has impacted your life.
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P.S. Learn more about how developing your intuition can enhance your life: Click here now.
“And, when you want something, all the universe conspires in helping you to achieve it.”
Paulo Coelho, from The Alchemist
The Law of Attraction: Spending vs. Investing
Did you watch the movie, “The Secret” by Rhonda Byrne or read her book? Most of the world now knows about the Law of Attraction thanks to her. Unfortunately, while Byrne did a huge service for the world the depth of the information wasn’t there to accurately convey how to bring more abundance to your life.
There’s a misconception that in order to attract abundance into your life you ought to prime the pump of the LOA by spending money. Perhaps you were told that in order to demonstrate your faith in the Law of Attraction you ought to “dig your ditches before the rain.” This idea originally comes from a passage in the Bible but I first read about it in Florence Scovel Shin’s book, “The Game of Life and How to Play It.”
What Shin meant was that if you’re praying for rain you must take action and dig the ditches to hold the water ahead of the rain. “Digging ditches” clearly communicates that you firmly and unwaveringly have faith in the Universe to bring about what you desire.
You might have misconstrued this advice by first buying the things you wanted as a demonstration that the money to pay for them would then show up. Unfortunately all this does is create debt. “Digging your ditches” symbolizes that you must have the faith and take action toward achieving your goals even when there isn’t a “cloud in the sky” to indicate that it’s going to rain.
There is a difference between spending and investing
Notice though, Shin did not say to go out and use up all the water you have as an act of faith that it would rain and then the water would be replenished. This is what you’re doing when you spend money you don’t have. You’re draining your resources. What Shin advises is to invest your energy and resources in creating a “ditch” or reservoir so that it will hold all the water you need whenever you need it. This is what “investing” does, it becomes a resource that pays you back again and again over time.
Spending money doesn’t garner the same results as investing
For example you see a gorgeous pair of boots and think,”If I buy the boots I’m showing the Universe I trust that the money is coming to pay the credit card bill.” But after you spend the money your life hasn’t changed. You have a nice pair of boots and nothing else to show for it.
When you invest money you take an action that ensures that the money will return a dividend, in other words, pay you back. For example you might be in a 401k retirement program at work. Over time with good investment strategies this investment will grow and be part of the money you live on in retirement.
You might invest in buying a home for the same reason; you anticipate that with time its value will increase so that someday when you sell it you’ll get back more than you spent to buy it. This is also the reason for investing in education. When you learn something useful it contributes to your ability to apply it in a way that the actions taken based on knowledge you received pays you back over time.
In general buying “stuff” for yourself is spending not investing. Clothes, furniture, cars and the like while needed are not investments. Buying something the goes up in value and returns a profit when you sell it is an investment. Examples of some good investments that will improve your life are education, coursework and coaching.
Investing in yourself is the entire premise of self-development. You are developing yourself for something, right? You probably want to learn how to be more successful at life which is to be happier, peaceful, self confident, more capable, loving and a better human being I would imagine.
Invest in yourself instead of spending on yourself
To unlock the power of the Law of Attraction invest in yourself. Investing in your education is one of the best investments you can make. Invest in a course that will help you learn what actions you need to take to create a better life. This will prime the pump of the LOA in your life much more than a one shot purchase such as a pair of boots. To invest in yourself is to dig a ditch and build a reservoir of resources that will pay you back handsomely over time.
Action demonstrates your faith in the Law. You must take the proper action steps. Wishing and visualizing are not enough. Action is how you “seed” the clouds for all that rain. And, if you don’t know what you want that’s a problem. You must know what you want in order to know the proper action steps to take.
Knowing what you want is key
If you aren’t sure of what you want your life to look like and all you think is that you want “abundance” you’re going to be disappointed. Abundance comes in many forms. You’ve got to be specific in order to come up with the action steps to seed your cloud.
Prime the pump of the Law of Attraction
Know what you want. Know your purpose and mission in life and then you will know what actions to take. After all you can’t get there until you know where “there is,” right? Knowing your purpose is having the map to get to your destination. As soon as you are clear on where you want to go the result of every action step taken will yield much more dramatic results toward your ultimate success.
If you are unclear of your purpose invest in yourself. Open the way and seed the cloud toward your abundance by investing not spending on yourself. Find a coach or take a course on how to find your life purpose, read a book on this topic or have a thorough astrological reading of your purpose done.
The sooner you know where you’re heading the sooner you’ll get there!
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P.S. Find your purpose – click here.
Photo: © Fantasista – Fotolia.com
How emotional pain imprisons you
Pain springs from many sources. Most common is a loss of some type such as the loss of a loved one, loss of a relationship, loss of job and income, loss of your health, loss of sense of self and the loss of a way of life you previously had such as through divorce. The source of the emotional pain may be different but the results are the same; imprisonment by your pain.
Pain holds you hostage. When you’ve been wounded deeply the result is trauma and standing still with your life for fear of being open and vulnerable to more pain. Pain keeps us frozen in place for years unless it’s addressed. Is your emotional pain paralyzing you?
Measure your pain.. Take the quiz:
1. Have you suffered incredible loss such as the losing someone close to you, lost a job/career, income, financial stability, your health, gone through a divorce?
2. Do you long to change your life but feel afraid of stepping into the unknown?
3. Do you yearn for a greater, bigger more fulfilling life?
4. Do you feel confused about your direction?
5. Are you overwhelmed because you’re working harder than ever before?
6. Does your indecisiveness lead you to contemplate giving up at times?
7. Are you uncomfortable opening up and asking for help?
8. If you were to review your life over the last few years would you notice not much has changed?
If you said yes to two or more of these questions your emotional pain is holding you back from achieving your goals and living a life you love.
How pain paralyzed me
After the economic melt down in 2008 my income declined dramatically. The following year it declined again and every year after that. I went from spending without a care to living in lock-down mode not buying a thing I didn’t have to. I sold my home to conserve my resources. If I had stayed in my house I would have burned through a retirement account it had taken me twenty plus years to acquire.
The industry I was in was decimated by the financial crisis. I frantically applied for jobs in other industries only to be turned down. No one would hire me because I had no experience outside of this one area.
I didn’t know what to do with myself to rebuild my income. I remained in the industry I knew just to stay afloat and changed employers a few times hoping things would get better. By the time I was making some money again I had lost interest in my career and it became a huge chore to do it again day in and day out. But I so feared not having an income that I remained stuck by refusing to walk away from my job for the “security” it gave me. Then one day I woke up and knew I just couldn’t do it anymore.
Release your emotional pain
I realized I had allowed my pain to imprison me in a life I didn’t love. My fear of loss of income kept me working full time. Every other spare minute was spent writing and publishing and having private sessions with clients. Honestly, I didn’t think I was going to make it through some days. I had too much to do, too many obligations and responsibilities, too little time and no support.
The moment I comprehended what my emotional pain was doing to me I had a mental shift and opened to the possibility of reaching out for help. I saw that “staying afloat” was not the same as living. I allowed myself to begin dreaming again and I remembered that I had big dreams.
Connecting to my pain and seeing how much it was costing me to “stay afloat” in order to avoid the fear of the unknown empowered me and turned on the “lightbulb above my head.”
“Your wound is the place where light enters you.” –Rumi
I realized that my fears about the loss of money had kept me stuck at a certain level for far too long. I committed right then to do things differently from that moment on. I felt my enthusiasm for life returning. The next day I woke up excited about the prospect of changing my life.
The more enthused I became about playing full out and going after what I wanted the more wonderful opportunities came to me. By not being afraid any longer I had released a flood of power that had been frozen inside of me. This wave moved me forward smoothly, easily and most effortlessly.
Realizing how your emotional pain has been holding you hostage can inspire an epiphany and empower you to move forward just as easily too. You just need to know the system to be released from your pain and have those prison gates open.
The simple 8 step method for releasing the power trapped beneath your pain:
1. Acknowledge the pain. Sometimes the pain is too great. You don’t want to look at it because looking at it opens the wounds again. The problem is that cramming a painful memory way down is not a solution. The pain is frozen mass inside that blocks the circulation of life energy. Bringing it up to the surface of your awareness where you can heal is what releases the power to move forward in your life.
2. Forgive. Forgive yourself and anyone else whom you believe may have contributed to the situation. For example, I was angry about what happened in my industry and about how my my lucrative career had been taken away. To find who or what to forgive look to what you’re angry about. Forgiveness frees you from dragging this painful burden around with you. It gives you permission to live again!
3. Be grateful. Find the good in everything. There is always a silver lining no matter how things appear. For example, now I see that had my industry not imploded I would not have had the opportunity to grow and change. I wouldn’t have developed the desire to have my own business either. It’s actually been a great lesson. Where you can you be grateful and find the good in your own situation?
4. Focus on what you want. The more attention you give to the things you don’t like or want in your life the more of your awareness they consume. Start thinking about what you do want instead. Allow yourself to dream and dream big! When a situation or condition arises that you would rather not have in your life ask yourself what you would like instead? Play that scenario over in your mind rather than the one you dislike.
5. Claim your good! Staying afloat is not living and it is certainly not claiming the good the Universe has in store for you. When we allow our pain to paralyze us we live each day just to get through it. This fearful attitude keeps our good at bay. You are here to live up to your highest potential and to have, be and do whatever you desire but you have to claim your good. To claim your good believe you deserve to live a better life.
6. Tame your fears. I love this quote from Mark Twain: “I am an old man and have known a great many troubles, but most of them never happened.” The truth is that most of what we fear never happens. Fear is imaginary and keeps us from jumping fully into our lives. Make a vow to stop worrying and listening to your fears.
7. Listen to your intuition – it knows the way. Your intuition is that voice inside that keeps nudging you to be more, to live up to your potential and go after what you want. If you follow your intuition you will not fail to bring forth the exciting life you dream of. You stop listening to your intuition when you allow your fear to be the predominant voice you listen to. You wouldn’t have this voice inside pulling you toward accomplishing certain things if you already didn’t possess the capability and power to achieve them.
8. Get support. There’s a mystique especially in Western culture that upholds the lone individual as a hero and role model. It’s not the reality. Everyone needs support. Everyone needs community. Everyone needs to learn from more successful people. Find a mentor, hire a coach or join a mastermind. The truth is if you could have done it alone you would have done it already, right?
What power would you release if you dealt with your pain? What has holding onto your pain really cost you? Join the conversation. Leave a comment.
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P.S. Is pain paralyzing your life? Contact me to schedule a life purpose reading to discover how to change it – here.
Click here to visit 30 Days to Bold.
Introducing an exciting new course, “30 Days of Bold,” from Courage Coach, Tess Marshall.
Tess, for readers who don’t know you, please introduce yourself.
I currently work as a writer, speaker, and courage coach and have a master’s degree in counseling psychology. I love to inspire people to overcome their fears and live-out-loud. I blog at The Bold Life, for an amazing and growing community, that I love dearly. My work has allowed me to reach people all over the world.
My passion is to help others grow through their fears and take the action needed to create and live a meaningful and inspired life. I’ve written three books and created a brand new course, 30 Days to Bold.
Tell us more about 30 Days of Bold
30 Days to Bold is an interactive and live course that begins on Monday February 18th. It allows us to support and personally get to know each other. We overcome our fears and grow through our courage.
The course is designed to take one beyond excuses, procrastination, worries and doubts…from fear to freedom. You’ll gain the confidence to take bold action.
• Every Monday you will receive in your inbox a password that will give you access to the course on a private page at The Bold Life where you’ll find all the material, videos, ebooks and more.
• Access to a private live long Facebook page with myself and other bold people in the 30 Days of Bold community.
• A series of personal and heartfelt videos from my awesome and courageous friends. They share their own stories and expertise on how they have overcome fear and how you can too.
• A Series of Video Interviews with myself and other courageous experts.
• 4 LIVE group-coaching calls with me.
• My stories/guidance/wisdom gleaned from helping thousands of people through my work as a psychologist, life coach, and professional speaker.
• Weekly, worksheets, lessons, activities, encouragement and support.
• Over $100 in bonuses and other goodies from my fearless friends.
•Plus a copy of my Ecourse Take Your Fear and Shove it if you sign up before January 14th.
Why did you create it?
I understand what it is like to be paralyzed by fear. In the past, I made mistakes, I spent my time freaked out, playing small, denying and hiding from fear.
I sunk into depression and I hated my life. One day, when I couldn’t stand the pain, craziness or drama any longer… I reached out for help. I hired a therapist, attended a support group, found a mentor, hired a coach and put into practice what I learned.
Little by little, I turned my life around. I created a new story. The payoff of my post-fear life…I raised my family, I saved my marriage, became a successful therapist, a coach, an author, a professional speaker, a blogger, a writer…I achieved things I never would have thought possible.
It’s the culmination of everything I’ve learned. I’m still asked, “How do you do it?” 30 Days of Bold is my answer. You only need to apply it to your own situation. Not only does 30 Days of Bold offer the tools to move beyond fear, it offers a map to self-love, faith in oneself, risk-taking, to positively anticipate your future and achieve a deeper appreciation of life and everything in it. We often look up to brave, bold and successful people. It’s time to become one of them!
In the end, I’ve been blessed with very loving and brilliant mentors and teachers throughout my lifetime. It’s my turn to give.
Who is 30 Days to Bold for?
Anyone who is tired of false beliefs, facades and wants to live authentically.
Anyone needing practical tools and concrete tips on how to grab hold of their fears—with a sense of power, excitement and bold.
Anyone who is interested in joining a community of people who are not waiting for “someday” to change their lives.
Anyone who wants to overcome excuses, rejection and failure and move from victim to creator.
Anyone who wants to loosen the grip of doubt and tap into their inner resources.
Anyone who is sick and tired of paralyzing fear and is ready for greater and deeper success, love and happiness.
If you are ready to:
Get clear and commit to what you really want for yourself. Make fear work for you instead of against you. Go from imagining the worst to expecting the best. Unearth your innate strength and freedom. Find a sense of safety while living in a world of fear. Step beyond your limitations and experience your true self. Be confident. Live without apology, explanation or apprehension. Receive encouragement and friendship from a supportive community. Then this course is for you!
What are the benefits for those who enroll and participate in 30 Days of Bold? Is it life changing?
It is life-changing if you do the exercises, watch the videos, get involved in the community and apply what you learn.
Anais Nin said, “And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom.”
Once you change your life, there is no going back. You may fall back but you can’t stay back. It’s impossible.
When you learn how to walk through your fears you become unstoppable. 30 Days of Bold is an invaluable opportunity for you to increase your confidence, speak your truth and make the decisions that will improve your life and put you in harmony with your deepest desires.
The course will lead you out of the pitfalls of fear and insecurity and into the power of freedom an innate courage. Change your life and find freedom. Don’t delay. Join us today.
How did you become so bold?
I grew up on a produce farm with nine siblings. We were all very competitive for our parents love and attention. It was speak up or lose out. We also began working in the fields and at the Farmer’s Market as young children. At the market, we learned how to sell and turn our customers into friends! We became experts in sales by age 13! That’s a childhood of bold action.
How can we develop courage?
Be willing take action. Make a difference and use your talent and gifts to make the world a better place. Things will go wrong. So what? You’ll make mistakes. So what? You will be rejected. So what?
Keep going, ask for help, find support and be willing to do what it takes.
“I have gone ahead despite the pounding in the heart that says: turn back.” ~Erica Jong
30 Days of Bold offers you the safety and support of a loving community. You don’t have to go it alone.
What do you hope that people will take away after completing the course?
I want them to see that they are not alone and that there is nothing wrong with them. We all fail, we all make mistakes and we all have flaws. I want them to own their power and innate goodness. I want them to use their innate courage and have faith in themselves. I want to see them use their gifts, talents and to offer them to others along the path. When one of us succeeds, we all succeed in making the world a better place to live!
Where could you use a shot of “bold” in your life? What would you like to change and where do you feel stuck? Share with us.
If you enjoyed this post share it with a friend on Twitter, Facebook or Google+. Thank you!
P.S. To find your bold voice within – click here!
Tess Marshall is a Courage Coach and the creator of, The Bold Life. Her blog is a mix of inspiration, spirituality, and personal development. She will inspire you to follow your heart, unearth your bold, and create a meaning and love-filled life. She can help you be more courageous and step beyond your fears. She believes we’re here on planet earth to grow in kindness and love. In order to do so we need to let go of fear and take bold action. Check out her new bold course – 30 Days of Bold.