Why Do We Resist Our True Calling?

So many of us work for years in professions that don’t match who we really are inside.

We’re aware that we’re unhappy with what we’re doing, but we don’t know any other way so we continue doing the same old thing day in and day out.

Then one day we hear this little voice urging us to do something else that we feel drawn to. It could be anything; cooking, painting, starting a business, writing, going back to school, etc., and suddenly we realize the source of the dissatisfaction with our lives comes from not finding fulfillment in what we do for a living.

It suddenly hits us – life is short and we have spent way too much time doing something that wasn’t what we really wanted to do. Time to make some changes before it’s too late.

After our big A-ha moment panic sets in. How are we going to make this big change? How are we going live? Where will the money come from?

And then we freeze.

Then we hear another voice and this voice calms us. It tells us that we’re fine just the way we are. Our job is fine. It really isn’t so bad. We can do it for another XX years. After we retire there will be plenty of time to pursue cooking, painting, starting a business, writing, or going back to school. We let out a sigh of relief and put our heads down and plod along on the well worn path of our lives.

Another few years go by and we’re not entirely miserable but we’re not excited by our lives either.

All the while that little voice continues to whisper:
Don’t forget your dream. Pick up a paintbrush.
Don’t forget your dream. Write your book.
Don’t forget your dream. Begin catering parties.
Don’t forget your dream. Start your business.
Don’t forget your dream. Go back to school.

We hear it and wince. Why does this voice continue to torture us? It’s so silly after all. We have good jobs and benefits and live nice comfortable lives – why would we want to give all that up? We push back and bottle the voice in a deep place within where it is muffled.

Another few years go by and we face the same inner struggle again. We are older and there is even less time left and the whisper is more urgent now:
Do it before it’s too late – live your dream.

What have we done? Where has the time gone? Is it realistic to think we can pursue our passion? There’s too much at stake. What about my health benefits and retirement account? We shake our heads and think it will have to wait until we retire.

Why does this pattern repeat itself so often?

The answer is always the same; it’s fear. We fear giving up our security and we fear the failure that might result from pursuing our dreams. Or we fear our own success and having to maintain it over and over again.

Our blown out of proportion fears will enslave us for the rest of our lives if we don’t deal with and see them in their true light.

Fear is nothing more than a pesky fly that we’ve allowed to terrorize us.

Who ever heard of being deathly afraid of a stinkin’ little fly?

How silly is it to think that you’re going to let a fly stop you from leaving the “safety” of your home every day to live your dream?

Once you take a stand and do the thing you fear most that fly disappears just as surely as if you’d squashed it with a fly swatter. Kaput! It’s gone.

The longer you put off following your heart the harder it is to leave the supposed “security” behind and the bigger that fly seems to become.

Let’s examine this notion of “security.” What it is that you’re clinging to? Is it a paycheck, health benefits, a retirement account, or is it the relief of knowing you don’t have to create your own paid work and then deal with obtaining a paycheck, health benefits and a retirement account yourself?

The truth is that you are here for a purpose – and that purpose is to use your gifts and abilities to create meaningful work that contributes to the world in some way. If you don’t contribute your gifts and abilities the world is missing something only you can provide.

If you’re born with these gifts and abilities you’re also born with the knowledge and talent of how to express them in the world. You will be paid for expressing them and, you will be able to buy your own health benefits and contribute to your own retirement account. It cannot be any other way.

Every answer is already within you.

Your job is to swat the fear out of your way and have faith in yourself.

Fear clouds your vision and obscures the path to living your dream. But, the moment you decide to move toward expressing your gifts is the moment you will see the path appear before you – and not before.

Go ahead – swat that fly and take the first step toward your dream and watch as the path appears before you.

As you move toward the sensational life you’ve always dreamed of you’ll wonder why it took so long to get over the fear of that one stinkin’ little fly.

If you’d like to learn more about how mentoring can help you become more confident and empowered “click here for a Complimentary Life Direction Clarity Session with me.

Have you been letting fears hold you back from pursuing your dream? What exactly are you afraid of? What action can you take today that will move you closer toward living this dream?

If you enjoyed this post subscribe and please share it on Twitter, Facebook & G+. Thank you.

P.S. Find your true calling – pick up my book, The Intuition Principle, on Amazon .

You are here for a purpose. The world awaits your gifts – don’t deprive us of what only you can contribute.

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  1. I’m sure this is because no dratted fear-fly would dare come within a mile of your dreaded swatter! there are many of people who fade away and resist their calling as you explained,that’s fear! As such we look for a calling in work and a release and enjoyment in spare time and never see the wisdom bridge that links between them.

    • Nannie,
      Excellent point! Yes, we do look at our “true calling” as work and then never bridge the things we enjoy doing as a creative release.
      Thank you for sharing that with us.
      It’s a pleasure to meet you.

  2. I like the idea of “swatting” my fears away. I have been moving past my fears in the recent years. But I’m at the phase when I’m “swatting” a lot more LOL! I realized that i have been standing in my own way. So my biggest obstacle is really myself.
    Evelyn Lim recently posted…Self Love Series Say Yes to Loving YourselfMy Profile

    • Evelyn,
      You’re not alone. I think for the majority of people their biggest obstacle is their own fears.
      We hold ourselves back by what we think whether it’s thinking we’re not good enough, or we can’t accomplish the things we dream about, or the fear of ridicule for our dreams, etc. Go for it girl!! I’m behind you 1000 percent!

  3. Hi Angela, John Sherry is right…you are really ‘in the zone’ these days! I’m sure this is because no dratted fear-fly would dare come within a mile of your dreaded swatter! I want one of those weapons…and I want to batter down the walls of my comfort zone aka my prison. Thanks for this brilliant post Angela…you will keep us all on our toes! 😉
    Rosemary recently posted…Signposts and RosesMy Profile

    • Hi Rosemary,
      Oh my goodness! Thank you Rosemary. How will I ever top this now? The pressure is on.
      I love how you put that too – you want to “batter down the walls of my comfort zone aka my prison.” So true.
      Our comfort zone does become a prison after a while. That’s why we need that fly swatter!
      Thank you for your lovely compliments. I really appreciate your visiting me here!

  4. Ah, the deer in the headlights syndrome! I’ve worked with hundreds of new entrepreneurs over the past few years starting/building home based businesses. It’s always made me crazy to see, time and again, people get to the point of achieving success and/or some serious recognition, only to stall or suddenly quit.

    Funny thing is, I realized recently that I’m guilty of the same thing. Years ago (too many) people made a big deal about how much talent I had as an artist. Sold every piece I painted then pushed to do more, more. Too much pressure, too much attention -I abruptly quit. All these years later I’m daydreaming about giving it another try. So, maybe the answer is you have to first learn how to listen to your own heart and shut out the external buzz, beeps and twits.
    Marquita Herald recently posted…Shhh I’m Problem Solving!My Profile

    • Hi Marquita,
      What a wonderful point you make. I agree. I do think sometimes we have to make the mistakes and take the roads we’ve taken in life in order to value and understand how our intuitive guidance works. Yes, when we look back over our lives and realize that our hearts were speaking to us loud and clear we will be able to listen and follow much more easily the second time around.

  5. I think many of us have fear around living our life purpose because we fear that it won’t work out. I think that keeps a lot of us from going after what we truly want. I also believe that when our life purpose is not traditional we might fear what others will say or think about us. I think your advice to “swat away our fear” is golden. I think the financial crisis caused a lot of people to rethink what “security is” and I see in my business a lot of people who really want to live their life purpose despite the fear because they are recognizing fear and security for the illusions that they are.

    • Hi Pamela,
      I’m so pleased to have you comment here today! Yes, we fear failing at our unconventional choice of a path, and we also fear what people will think of us. You’re so right to point out that the financial downturn has caused a lot of people to question what “security” is. Fear and security are both illusions – so true!
      Thanks for leaving such a brilliant comment!

  6. Very encouraging, Angela! Wish I had seen it about ten years ago. The Universe really had to kick me in the butt to get me out of my safe-but-unfulfilling job, for all the reasons you mentioned above.

    Now that I AM out and doing work that I find much more satisfying, I routinely challenge my spirit helpers to support me if they want me to keep doing things that advance my higher purpose. And they seem to be responding! Ask and it shall be given, as they say. :)
    Anna Barlowe recently posted…Check- Please!My Profile

    • Hi Anna,
      I’m glad you escaped your cubicle! I’m still imprisoned by mine but hope to be free of it by the end of the year.
      I think you make an excellent point. If you’re going in the wrong direction you will find the support dissipating, but if you’re moving in the right direction in your life you’ll find that you receive the support you need to advance. Always a pleasure to have you stop by!

  7. Insightful question Angela! I think our true calling often masquerades in the hobbies and activities that orbit our life. As such we look for a calling in work and a release and enjoyment in spare time and never see the wisdom bridge that links between them. For me our true caling is in what’s always been there even if we’ve spent our whole life looking the other way. Another high energy post Angela, you are in an amazing zone right now!!!
    John Sherry recently posted…If You Could Be Anyone Who Would It BeMy Profile

    • Hi John,
      Thanks so much. I’m glad you enjoyed the post. I agree about our interests and hobbies being so overlooked. I think when a person constantly steers a conversation to a certain subject that is a big clue too.
      I wish I could “control” these amazing zones John! Thanks so much for your support. I truly appreciate it very much.

  8. I LOVE this, and relate wholeheartedly. I’ve always tried to do the “go to college, work 9-5 thing”, and I’ve been good at it, but my real love is writing. I’ve been scared before that I couldn’t make a living at it, but I finally decided to go in with tons of confidence in myself because I know I CAN do it. Looking forward to the journey! :)

    • Hi Emily,
      It’s so nice to meet you. I’m so glad you’ve got the confidence to keep your pesky fly away! That’s very encouraging.
      I want to hear all about your journey sometime! I’m glad you’re looking forward to it – that’s the right attitude that will get you where you want to go. Thanks so much for visiting today!

  9. This is where I’m at right now – I really am finally ready to take the leap and start my Reiki/Intuitive Counseling practice full-time in terms of my skill set, but I’m not completely ready yet. It’s hard to give up the full-time job with guaranteed/set wages. But my guides/intuition keep bringing me back to the fact that I’ve gotta take the plunge eventually. Not yet…but soon.

    Fear is damn hard to swat away!
    Lindsay recently posted…Mercury retrograde in Aries –My Profile

    • Hi Lindsay,
      I hear you loud and clear. I know exactly what you’re going through as I’m in the same boat. You can’t make the leap until you feel complete calm inside. If you do throw yourself out there before you have total resonance inside your fears are liable to sabotage your success.
      Yes, fear is damn hard to swat away just like a pesky fly it returns. I’m carrying a huge fly swatter with me wherever I go these days!

  10. Hi Ange,
    Writing from Belgium…can’t wait to hear about the workshop.
    I agree that fear is the crippler. Fear of failure is a difficult obstacle to overcome. It’s easier and safer to stay in the pattern. Even with constant reminders and swatting the fly it is strong. But thanks for the encouragement.

    • HI Rosemarie,
      I look forward to speaking with you when you return. I keep a fly swatter with me at all times!

  11. Angela,

    We all have a dream inside us, but out of compliance with society and fear of uncertainty we opt out and take the easy though ultimately unfulfilling route. I feel fortunate that I recognized this early and am working to build my dream vocation and calling. I know in due time I will be where I want to be without restrictions on my creativity and growth. It is now easier than ever to do this and taking small steps and learning along the way is all it takes. Though I can see it being much more difficult for those who have a family, but its still possible.
    Joe Wilner recently posted…Words of Wisdom to Help You Find Your CallingMy Profile

    • Hi Joe,
      I’m so glad your making strides to make your true calling a reality. I have no doubts either that you will get there.
      It is more difficult when we have greater financial burdens for sure, but as you say it’s still possible. It may just take longer.
      Thanks so much for stopping by and commenting. It’s a pleasure to have you visit.

  12. Hi Angela,

    Many people in the world merely exist day to day, doing what they think they need to do to survive. Most of the time, they follow the wisdom of the crowd, but little do they know that the crowd does not always know better and what others do might not be good for them. In truth, each of us are unique. We have different strengths and weaknesses, likes and dislikes. But as you rightly point out, it takes courage to follow our true calling. After all, this means forging our own paths in life and this can be seen as a dangerous endeavor where the risk of failure is high. Many people believe that it is safer to remain in their comfort zones.

    But security is an illusion. We need only look at the wars in the Middle East and the disaster in Japan to realize this. Even though we may not be directly affected, we are all affected indirectly by these events. This realization poses a danger. If we are reliant solely on one source of income or if we have only one skill in life, we may be hard pressed to change if something should happen to our rice bowl. Unless we learn to develop our skills and passions, if some unfortunate change should happen to our lives, we may not have the flexibility to adapt then.

    Thank you for sharing this lovely article! :)

    Irving the Vizier
    The Vizier recently posted…Everything is Difficult at FirstMy Profile

    • Hi Irving,
      Wow! What a great point you make. Yes, there is no “real” security in life. It is as much an illusion/delusion as is fear. This is a great insight. All things in the temporal world are illusions that blind us the the truth that we are one family of eternal beings connected to same source. Thanks so much for sharing your wisdom here Irving.

  13. That’s such a great article – fear can rule our life everywhere – throttling the dreams we have, and as you said it’s about taking a stand and taking action.

    I’ve been stopped myself from following through with what I know I have to do – at a level of integrity to the self, and have resolved it – it’s still out there in the future, but it’s real, and getting closer everyday – and there is the fight, some days fear wins – somedays it’s possibility :-)

    Love your writing!
    S_Thomas recently posted…The questionMy Profile

    • HI S_Thomas,
      It’s so nice meeting you. Yes, we’ve all been stopped by fear. It’s sometimes two steps forward and one step back – and that’s okay as long as fear doesn’t immobilize you. Thanks so much for coming by and commenting.

  14. How true what you have written especially Fear is nothing more than a pesky fly that we’ve allowed to terrorize us.How often that
    stops us from being who we truly are.picking up the paintbrush this morning was empowering
    Thank you
    Suzie Cheel recently posted…The Power of GratitudeMy Profile

    • Hi Suzie!
      I love that: FEAR is false evidence appearing real. So true.
      When we buy into the fear we cut off our connection to our intuitive guidance.
      Without this connection leading us to our next steps we will make many missteps in life.
      Love having you visit. I’m so glad you picked up the paintbrush!

  15. This is a great article post! there are many of people who fade away and resist their calling as you explained,that’s fear! Or they might have had a lot of failure some where down the road, but it’s really depends on our focus and knowing what we are good at! Sometimes, a job where we are not called to can sometimes blind what our true calling is in life in order to bring value to people! Great article angela!
    Tyler J.Logan recently posted…How to deal with a person whom youre uncomfortable being aroundMy Profile

    • Hi Tyler,
      It’s a pleasure meeting you. I’m so glad you “get” the article Tyler.
      Many of do things and we’re pretty good at them, and may even get promoted and make a decent living so we think that it must be our true calling, but just ’cause we’re good at something doesn’t make it so!

  16. This is great, Angela… you really went deep today. If we want to experience something fresh and good about ourselves, we must do something fresh and good for ourselves. The idea of expressing our unrealized potential in unique ways is always taking root in our mind. When we concentrate on the presence of this potential we feel it welling up from deep within. Once we develop this quality in ourselves, it is ours permanently; it may fade away but it will never go away.
    rob white recently posted…The Value of ThoughtsMy Profile

    • Hi Rob, I’m glad you found the article deep.
      I think we all have so much unrealized potential but we push it away when we force ourselves to conform to the norms of society.
      Making a living is not the same as making a life. A life is full of joy and enthusiasm –
      Thanks so much for visiting and adding to the conversation here Rob.

  17. Lately, I’ve been through a lot of things. Then I saw a movie, Lord of The Rings. There is a good quote from the magician – We can’t decide what comes to us, but we are given absolute freedom to decide what to do with the given time. I think I’ve found bliss.
    Jaky Astik recently posted…Does your business need an expansion planMy Profile

    • Hi Jaky,
      I’m sorry to hear that you’ve been through a lot lately. Although sometimes all our problems teach us a lot and end up opening doors for us, so there may be a silver lining to it all. Oooh, I like that quote from The Lord of the Rings. Yes, we are in charge of our reactions to events in our lives and how we allocate our time – and that’s about it, so always make the best of it is my philosophy too. Thanks so much for commenting Jaky!



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